Ya know that shadowy unnamed villain? How would you like to know all of his secrets? OR what if we waste over 44 min of your life by giving you a ton of garbage that in no way matches up with the show you’ve been watching up to this point? Better yet let’s try and force you to sympathize with him whilst hijacking the murders of actual humans for our shitty TV show. It’s ok we’re baby-boomers we own history and can exploit tragedy for commercial tat all we want! P.S. If you don’t like it it doesn’t even matter #Loophole #FuckYou Chris joins us to discuss “Musings of a Cigarette Smoking Man” and the Millennium episode “Blood Relatives”

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Where nonsense conspiracy theories will always have hammers dropped on them.

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Listen to Episode 4×07 – 2:14:27

Tags: "Hey I'm just trying to keep up", 1962, 1963, 1991, 1992, 1996, A fouty four minute fuck you to the audience, A troubled orphan, all the facts, All The President's Men, Anita Hill, Apology Thwarting, Apparently Chris Carter was among the people that didn't have a fucking clue what was happening in this episode, Arbitrary use of black and white, assassinations, Baby Boomers, Bane, Baywatch Nights, Bill Mulder, Brad Cupples, Bruce Harwood, Buffalo Bills, Chris JC, Chris Owens, Cigarette Smoking Man, Claire Laffar, Coincidence, CSM-25 countermeasure filter, Dan Zukovic, Dana Scully, David Duchovny, David Fredericks, Dean Aylesworth, Deep Throat, Dermot Mulroney, Doctor Who, Doctor Who: The Eleventh Hour Podcast, Donnelly Rhodes, Dummy-Repeating-Exposition-Detective, Dutch, Einstein's Twin Paradox: A New Interpretation, Everybody can have plenty of blame there's no reason to serve it just to Chris Carter, Feel free to send us candy money pizza or scotch, Forrest Gump, Fort Bragg, Fox Mulder, Frank Spotnitz, Frohike should be dead, Fuck you baby-boomers, Fun Ride is the cloak of cowards, Gecko, General Francis, Gillian Anderson, Gingervitis, Glen Morgan, Greer Cort, Hacky, Henry IV part one, Hordak, How the fuck was anyone associated with this garbage nominated for anything other than unemployment?, I can kill you whenever I please... but not today, I hate hate hate hate hate hate hate hate hate hate hate hate hate hate hate hate hate this episode, Indiana George, introtox, introtox.com, J. Edgar Hoover, Jack Colquitt, James Earl Ray, James Wong, Jerry Hardin, JFK, Jimmy Olsen, Joe DiMaggio, John F. Kennedy, John Fitzgerald Byers, Just listening to this to write tags is raising my blood pressure, Last Breath, Laurie Murdoch, Laziest fucking writers room on the planet, Lee Harvey Oswald, Life is like a box of chocolates, Lone Gunman, Lydon, magazine, Martin Luther King Jr., Melvin Frohike, Millennium, Miracle on Ice Hockey Match, Morgan Weisser, Movies, Mr. Hunt, Mul-dor bland minion of Skeletor, Mulder was a smug douche as a baby, Musings of a Cigarette-Smoking Man, My advice? Burn it! It stunk, Nicotine Patch, Oliver Stone is a crank, Paul Jarrett, Peter Hanlon, Quantum Leap, Rang Dang Do, Raul Bloodworth, Red Dwarf, Red Skull, Resignation letter, Robin Burdge, Rodney King Trial, Roman a Clef, Ronald, Smoking Man, So there were no aliens between Roswell and 1991 now? Is Samantha still part of the mythology or should we ignore that like every other piece of 'mythology' that gets obliterated on a weekly basis?, Soap, Space: Above and Beyond, Spooky, Super Bowl, Swashbuckling George, Take a Chance: A Jack Colquitt Adventure, Tammy Ginader, Teliko, Terry O'Quinn's Mustache, The Comedian, The Commedian, The Lone Gunmen, The Magic Bullet, The Mark Snow - Murray Gold - Hanz Zimmer of our Generation, The New Mustache Man, This episode is completely disposable, Tom Braidwood, Trust no one, UFO wreck, ugh Frohike not being killed off is the cherry on the top of this shit sundae, UN resolution 1013, Wasted Opportunity, We devise at least two dozen better versions of this ep, We're not exactly sure of what happened on Millennium but it was still better than X-Files, What is the new Interpretation Scully? WHAT IS IT?, What the fuck happened between George arriving and leaving to make him not kill Frohike?, Where the fuck are the elders? Or anyone, Where the hell is Darin Morgan, Who the fuck put an alien on a ventilator?, Why do they have a sign?, Why does the alien have a ventilator?, William B. Davis, Winnie The Pooh, Winter Soldier, X-Files, xfiles, You're Skeptical of Victim's Services? Really?, Young William Mulder

Matt joins us as we discuss the hilarious pile of garbage/Kristen Cloke demo tape “The Field Where I Died”
Mulder is sacrificing multiple lives in order to try and out-crazy a crazy person whilst pouting his way through a baffling hour of television seemingly made by humans for other humans. Also Millennium continues to be amazing.

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Where David Duchovny’s acting choices are never given a pass.

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Listen to Episode 4×05 – 1:51:56

Tags: 4:27, 522666, Acting Chops, Agent Jack Pierson, Agent Riggins, All characters named Melissa are the worst, American Civil War, Anthony Harrison, Apison Tennessee, Asshole Biddle Bridge, astral projection, ATF, Attorney, BATF Agent, Baywatch Nights, Behold I am life evermore, Billy Crystal, Brad Cupples, Brittany Tiplady, Catherine Black, Chattanooga Tennessee, Child Abuse, Chris Carter, Civil War Trench Bunkers, Claire Laffar, Claire really Mark Snow's the background music on this one, Columbo, Comedy Hijinx, Counting to potato with Fox Mulder, cult, Damon Lindelof and Chris Carter might be the same person. PROVE ME WRONG!, Dangerously disastrous faux medical treatment on an already psychological damaged person, David Duchovny, David Duchovny Cry Face, David Koresh, David Nutter, Donna White, Doug Abrahams, Douglas Roy Dack, Face Touching, Flukeman, Frank Black, Geanie, Gestapo George, Gillian Anderson, Glen Morgan, Gregorian Monk Chants, Harbaugh, Harry Truman, Herda Hada, I Died, Intro to Brisco, introtox, introtox.com, James Wong, Jim Jones, Jimmy Durante, Jonestown Massacre, Jordan Black, Kaboom, Kool-aid, Kristen Cloke, Krycek is the Little Traveler, Lance Henriksen, Les Gallagher, Lilly, Matt Humprey, Megan Gallagher, Melissa Rydell Ephesian, Michael Dobson, Michael Massee, Mighty Man, Mitch Pileggi, Mrs. Doubtfire, Mulder gets a grip of people killed, Mulderpout, multiple personality disorder, Multiple Personality Disorder may, One-Woman Show, Paracelsus, Past Lives, Peter Watts, Psychic Tammy, Regression hypnotherapy is You saw it. You heard it. Why can't you believe it?, Reincarnation, Rob Bowman, Robin Burdge, Robin Williams, Sam Anderson, Scully is getting worn down by all the dumb, Seriously though... what is the deal with the background music?, Seriously?, shirking responsibility to follow idiotic whims, Sidney, So much crazy, Souls aren't a thing, Space: Above and Beyond, Spooky, Tammy Ginader, Temple of the Seven Stars, Terry O'Quinn, That's a ROUGH 25, The Cabin, The Calusari, The Crow, The Field Where I Died, The Mighty Men, The stupidest deleted scenes ever, The ugliest triplets are back, THE WORST, There are 18 minutes cut that they were unable to make room for?, They really thought they were making an award winner on this one, This is clearly just Kristen Cloke's failed MADTV audition. The idea that there could actually be such a thing as a 'failed' MADTV audition is the true X-Files, This is garbage, This is so dumb, Thurston Bane III, TN is a rancid shithole of awful, Transcendence, Trying sooooo hard, Vernon Ephesian, Waco massacre, Walter Skinner, What is up with your rig out ponytail lawyer?, What the fuck is a soul? Somebody differentiate the known emergent property of the brain referred to 'the mind' from a 'soul' in any meaningful way, WHY IS MULDER ASKING QUESTIONS IN THE THERAPY SESSION?, World War II, X-Files, xfiles, ye olde drawer of random loose civil war photos, Yikes... just yikes, You're Dead!

Ina joins us at our favorite sweet potato pie restaurant to discuss Darin Morgan’s final episode ‘José Chung’s From Outer Space.’ This ep has the greatest cast ever and enough plot to fill all three kitchen sinks that are wedged into it. It’s wackier than the actual thoughts going through Jesse Ventura’s head at any given time.

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Where the illuminati will force you to phrase your answer in the form of a question.

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Listen to Episode 3×20 – 1:56:51

Tags: 9/11, A little too red, Alex Diakun, Alex Trebek, alien abduction, Alien Autopsy, Alien Cigarette Smoking, Allan Zinyk, America's insane drug policies and horrific criminal justice system, Beaker's Ovaltine Dinner, Best Cast Ever, Big Brother, Bill Murray, Blaine Faulkner, Blaine is the worst person that's ever been on this show and possibly the worst human that has ever been imagined, Cabinet of Caligari, Charles Nelson Reilly, Chris Carter, Chrissy, Clarissa Explains It All, Close Encounters of the Third Kind, Conspiracy Theory with Jesse Ventura, Dana Scully, Daniel Quinn, Darin Morgan, date rape, David Duchovny, Detective Manners, Diana Lesky, Dr. Fingers, Dr. Hand, Dungeons & Dragons, Dungeons and Dragons, El Cajon California, Fire in the Sky, Fox Mulder, Fuck you Scully for your ridiculous arbitrarily language censorship, Gibberish, Gillian Anderson, Harold, Harold is a super creep, Harold might be a werewolf now, HOW DO YOU NOT REALIZE YOU ARE CUTTING INTO AN ALIEN COSTUME?!?!, Hypnosis, inner space, Inside out and backwards clothing is just a bit too much. Why even bother redressing someone at that point?, Jaap Broeker, Jason Gaffney, Jeopardy, Jesse Ventura, Jose Chung, José Chung's From Outer Space, Klass County, Larry Musser, Lavamen, Lieutenant Jack Schaefer, Lord Kimboate, Lord Kinbote, Man in Black, Mandroid, Manimals, Mayor at the time Governor of the Manimals in reality, men in black, Michael Dobson, MK Ultra, Mulder masturbates to bigfoot porn and dreams of the Jersey Devil, non-fiction science fiction, Pale Fire, Patterson-Gimlin Film, Philip J. Klass, Plum Island, post-abduction syndrome, Reynard Muldrake, Rob Bowman, Roky Crikenson, Sadsack Grey, Sarah Sawatsky, Sargeant Hynek Mina E. Mina, Somebody punch this nerd and shove him in a goddamn locker already, Space: Above and Beyond, Sweet Potato Pie, The Manchurian Candidate, The Match Game, The military/industrial/entertainment complex, The music is mad kooky in this ep, The Reptillian Conspiracy, These 33 year olds weren't ready for sex, This is not happening, Twin Peaks, Ummm maybe calm all the rape talk down a bit, wikibigfeet.com, William Lucking, Worst autopsy doctor EVER!, Yappi, YES WE DO KNOW WHAT HYPNOSIS IS, Yo bitch take care of that gross bloody nose