Ian joins us for the handiwork of Chris Carter episode 8×15 – “Deadalive”. Mulder’s return from death, autopsy, embalming, and three months in the ground is questionable as Scully 11 month pregnancy. On the plus side Little Doggett and Slycek face off. The Lone Gunmen 1×07 “Planet of the Frohikes” features a talking chimpanzee named Simon White-Thatch Potentloins, and therefore is the best episode of Lone Gunmen ever.

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Where we call sentient intelligent creatures by the name they choose.

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Listen to Episode 8×15 – 1:31:07

Tags: Alex Krycek, Arthur Gaffin, Billy Miles, Brad Cupples, Bruce Harwood, Bruno Verdoni, car crash, Christian Mythology is as nonsensically convoluted and useless as X-Files Mythology, Claire Laffar, Cleopatra 2525, continued from previous episode, Cooky Coroner's, Daisy Kersh, Dana Scully, David Doty, David Duchovny, David Duchovny Mask, Deadalive, Dean Haglund, Down Below: A Babylon 5 IntroCast, Dr. Francis Orovetz, Dr. Haspliss, Dr. Lim, Easter, Edward Woodward, exhumation, fighting with a car driver, flag draped coffin, floating body, Fox Mulder, Gibby Brand, Gillian Anderson, Go Fuck Yourself, grave side ceremony, He is risen, He was autopsied embalmbed and buried in the ground without oxygen for THREE MONTHS, healer, Heart attack, introtox, introtox.com, It's not yours, Jimmy Bond, John Doggett, John Fitzgerald Byers, Kersh, Larry Dorf, Leland Crooke, Mad Sick Burns From CarriK and BradC, male in shower, man on life support, Manly Man Meter, Margaret Scully, Melvin Frohike, Minister, Mitch Pileggi, Monkeys, Morgue, Nanobots, Nelson Mashita, Nicholas Lea, No More Mulders, Pathology Assistant, Peanuts, Peter Bryant, Pierre, Pierre Boulle, piss and vinegar, Planet of the Frohikes, quoting jesus, raining, returning from the dead, Richard 'Ringo' Langly, Richard McGonagle, Robert Patrick, Run Little Doggett, seizure, Sergeant, Sheila Larken, Simon White-Thatch Potentloins, skin peeling off, Slycek, Spycek, Stephen Snedden, Stingray, Stringrays baby, T-1000, Tammy Ginader, Terminator Times, That's not how decomposition work, That's not how vaccines work, The Five Heartbeats, The Lone Gunmen, The Math is absolutely impossible, This is nonsense, Tom Braidwood, transformation, Walter Skinner, Web of Queer Podcast, Why did they spend money on this fisherman scene?, wilmington north carolina, X-Files, xfiles, Yves Adele Harlow, Zachary Ansley, Zuleikha Robinson

Matt, Will, and Mila join us for the magical Episode 7×21 – “Je Souhaite” wherein a scooterbitch gets his comeuppance and Mulder tries to impress his second magic Jinni.

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Where we all wish we had a stouthearted mule and a magic sack that was always full of turnips

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Listen to Episode 7×21 – 1:38:33

Tags: Alias, Amani, Anson Stokes, back from the dead, Benito Mussolini, Bernie Sanders, bicycle, bicycle crash, Boat, bolt cutter, box of matches, Brad Cupples, Brett Bell, Caddyshack can go fuck itself, Claire grants all our wishes, Claire Laffar, cobweb, coffee, Commentary, computer, consequence, Dana Scully, David Duchovny, Djinn, DjinnFacts, djinnuniverse.com, fairy tale, false tear, Fox Mulder, garbage can, gas explosion, Genie, Gillian Anderson, Gillian Anderson is a terrible mime, golf cart, hit by a truck, How do you raise a doorframe?, hysterical diarrhea, I Dream of Jeanie, Ifrit, introtox, introtox.com, invisibility, invisible man, Janeane Garofalo, Jay Gilmore, Je Souhaite, Jenn, Jinni, jinniyah, Kevin Weisman, Leslie Stokes, Magic Bag of Turnips, magic sack that was always full of turnips, man undressing, Mark Twain Trailer Court, missouri, Mitch Pileggi, monster chompers, Monsters, Morgue, Morgue Attendant, motorized scooter, mouth sealed shut, mysterious woman, oven, padlock, Paul Hayes, Paula Sorge, persian rug, photo, poofed, Powder, reference to barbara eden, Richard Nixon, Scooterbitches, Shadow People, stash, Stock Footage, storage, storage unit, Stouthearted Mule, Tammy Ginader, Tammy is the Donald Trump of the Djinn, The ep we've been awaiting since episode 7, The real magic is how Mulder is still employed, three wishes, title spoken by character, trailer park, tv remote, urn, video, walkie talkie, Walter Skinner, warehouse, Will Sasso, X-Files, xfiles, yacht, year 1977, year 1978, Yellow Bastard, yellow paint, Zombie

Guys if you’ve been waiting for an actually scary episode this is it! DJ_J-Pope_Jonny_Jon_Jon rolls out from his hidey hole to discuss the creepo monster episode ‘Home’. Where the monsters are monsters and the police are shockingly incompetent. Millennium descends into full-on Chris Carter dialogue and somehow the wife and daughter are still alive.

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Where there are no monsters under our beds.

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Listen to Episode 4×02 – 1:59:52

Tags: A black sheriff in a small town definitely locks his doors, A dark and stormy night, Adrian G. Griffiths, Adrian Huges is a rapist and sex offender, All the juices, American Civil War, Amputee, Aubrey, Babe, Baltimore, Barney Fife, Batman escape, Baywatch Nights, Bill Smitrovich, Brad Cupples, Bring it Home to Mamma, Brittany Tiplady, Cadillac, Catherine Black, Charlie Chaplin, Chin Music, Chris Carter, Chris Nelson Norris, Claire Laffar, classic = eye roll, Clint Howard is already 50% peacock how was he not in this, Creep Mulder, David Duchovny, Deputy Barney Paster Judith Maxie, DJ_J-Pope_Jonny_Jon_Jon, Don't play near the peacock house, Don't score a corpse in the refrigerator with your lunch, Edmund Peacock, Effective but uncreative mix tapes, Evil Telemarketing Cult, Frank Black, George Peacock, Gillian Anderson, Glen Morgan & James Wong, grossest use of a fork, herda hada herda, hillbillies, Hmmm I never thought of you as having any sort of maternal instincts you frigid harpy, Home, Home Alone, I wish they had muskets, If these yokel cunts would just talk to the authorities everything would have been fine, If this ep freaks you out too much just google Miniature Goldendoodle pictures and all will be well with the world, Inbreeding, incest, Intro to Brisco, Intro to X yuk yuk fest, introtox, introtox.com, It is undeniable that monsters lurk in the south, John Trottier, Johnny Mathis, Jon the wrong, Jordan Black, Karin Konoval, Kevin McCallister tactics, Kill the babies all the babies!, Kim Manners, Lachlan Murdoch, Lance Henriksen, Lieutenant Bob Bletcher, Little Traveler, LOCK YOUR DOORS, LSD, Mayberry, Meckel-Gruber Syndrome, Megan Gallagher, Morgue, Mrs. Barbara Taylor Kenny James, Mulder is a dick, Mulder/David Duchovny gets turned on by pigs, Nev-Laxova Syndrome, No. There's no chance that there's a connection between the monster baby and the house of incest monsters next to where it was found, NOPE!, Nope. Nope. NOPE!!!, oh he was just microwaved a little bit? Well as long as he only has minor CELLULAR DAMAGE I guess he'll be just fine and dandy., Old Men in shitty jackets with uncombed hair, Peacock, Peacock family, Peacock-blocked, Pennsylvania, Pennywise, Peter Watts, Pittsburgh, Put on some pants fool, Radio Singer, Robin Burdge, Scary, Science Fact: Heda Hada yokel cunts LOVE dead Elvis Newspapers, Sebastian Spence, Sheriff, Sheriff Andy Taylor, Sherman Peacock, Sports Facts, Sweetgum Lane, Tammy Ginader, Terry O'Quinn, That baby belongs in the ground, The Andy Griffith Show, The CEO of Hobby Lobby, The first scary X-files Ep, The Peacock Mother, The Rig, the worst cops, There's no turning back when big city Christian arts and crafts magnates start changing things, This ep broke Claire, This sheriff is an idiot, To angry for bullet points, Tucker Smallwood, War of Northern Aggression, We almost Broke Tammy, What happened to the rest of your limbs?, WHEN WILL THIS WIFE AND DAUGHTER BE KILLED, Winky winky, Wonderful Wonderful, X-Files, xfiles