DJ Johnny Jon Jon and Matt B join us for the insanity that is 5×04 “Detour” A super kooky romp through the swamp with Mark from RENT and conquistador monsters. No joke, that’s for serious what’s going on here whether you guys are willing to accept it or not. Magic. Conquistador. Monsters. Also we discuss Millennium 2×04 “Monster” which features the triumphant return of Kristen Cloke!

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Where Teliko watches over us all.

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Listen to Episode 5×04 – 1:32:46

Tags: A jenga tower of quasi dead bodies, Agent Carla Stonecypher, Agent Michael Kinsley, Alf Humphreys, Angels, Anthony Rapp, Blinkey the Ghost, Brad Cupples, Brett Dowler, Brittany Tiplady, Catherine Black, Cave Networks, Child Predators, Chris Hansen, Chris Owens, Claire Laffar, Colleen Flynn, Communication is the key, Conquistadors, Danielle Barbakow, David Duchovny, David Duchovny is such a smug smarmy douche, Demon Child, Deputy Bill Sherman, Detour, Do necksnaps count as negative words?, Don't Drop Guns. Also Don't Have Guns, Don't hit kids, Don't teach your kid how to murder animals for fun, FLIR, Frank Black, Frank Spotnitz, Fred Keating, Gillian Anderson, Gillian Barber, Gordon Roberts, Groot, Indian Guide, introtox, introtox.com, Irving Morganandwong, JC Wendel, Jeff Glaser, Jordan Black, Joy to the World, Kristen Cloke, Lance Henriksen, Lara Means, Lauren Diewold, Little Traveler, Louis Asekoff, Magic Swamp Thing Conquistadors, Mark from Rent, Marty Fox, Mary Gillis, Megan Gallagher, Merrilyn Gann, Michael Asekoff, Michael Sloan, Millennium, Mock Turtleneck of shame, More Episodes should feature people arbitrarily falling down holes, Mothman, Mr. Barbakow, Mrs. Asekoff, Mrs. Barbakow, Mulder's Genie, Never Underestimate the X-Files, Note Captain Jack Harkness also turned into a Swamp Thing head... is this just an accepted thing in dumb scifi shows? Was Yoda just a few years from turning into a floret Broccoli?, Officer Michele Fazekas, Penny Plott, Peter Watts, Predator: The Musical Starring Mark from RENT, Roadblock Genie, Robert Wisden, Scott Burkholder, Sidney, Simon Longmore, Snoopy we've got to take our AZT, Stingray is looking out for his lady, STONECYPHER? HER NAME IS STONECYPHER?!?!, Swamp Thing, Tammy Ginader, Team Building, Teliko, Terry O'Quinn, The bastard son of Groot and Teliko, The Evil Mindu, The Invisble Man, The Millennium Foster Home for lil' Damiens, The Millennium Group, The Never-Ending Story, The swamp is my world. It is who I am. It is what I am. I was once a man. I know the evil men do. Do not bring your evil here... I warn you. Beware the wrath of the Conquistadors, The worst actress in the history of X-Files is back, There's a gremlin on the wing, This IS Looney Tune, This is the wackiest nonsense ever, Tom Scholte, Tremors, Tyler Thompson, Weimaraner, When your Genie whispers Conquistador secrets... you listen, Why does Michele have ALL of the water, Wine and Cheese, X-Files, xfiles

Matt stops by to help us despise, hamburgle, and oscillate between shock and amusement on the subject of ‘Teliko’ the least racist racist episode of X-Files. Meanwhile an old friend returns in ‘Dead Letters’ when Pennywise comes to Millennium (and doesn’t kill the wife and/or daughter… yet).

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Where fountains are treated with the respect they deserve. Maybe too much respect.

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Listen to Episode 4×03 – 1:59:52

Tags: 1996 Summer Olympics, African Folk Tales, Agent Pendrell, Albino, Album Art Spoilers!, Alias, All new truths DO NOT begin as heresies and end as superstitions, American Immigration Policy is honorific monsterous, Bambara, Baywatch Nights, Bill Mackenzie, Blackula, Bob Morrisey, Brad Cupples, Brendan Beiser, Brittany Tiplady, Buckaroo Banzai, Bus Driver, Bye-Bye, Carl Lumbly, Catherine Black, CDC, Chris Carter, Claire Laffar, Clown, Congo, Creepo nightmare monster clowns, Dana Scully, Danny Wattley, David Duchovny, Dead Letters, Deceive, Deceive Inveigle Obfuscate, Dennis Rodman, Diabria, Dr. Simon Bruin, Eugene Tooms, First Officer, Fox Mulder, Frank Black, Frank Briggs, Fuck Married with Children, Fuck you Chris Carter, Gillian Anderson, Gross Drooling Mulder, Hamburgle, Howard Gordon, If you had ever been beaten by the police or had your home burned to the ground for no other reason than being born then maybe you would understand why he ran and why you would run too. <--BEST LIN, introtox, introtox.com, Inveigle, It's a Racist World, Jack Black references at 10am is not allowed, James Charleston, Jeff Goldblum, Jim Charleston, Jordan Black, Lance Henriksen, Laurie Holden, Little Traveler, Lt. Madsen, Making jokes at 10am hurts more, Marcus bitchslaps white-privilege-Mulder, Marcus Duff, Marita Cobrakai, Marita Covarrubias, Mark Snow is the Chris Carter of Music, Matt Bayes, Maxine Guess, Megan Gallagher, Michael O'Shea, Millennium, Millennium Minute(s), Mitch Pileggi, Mulder is a dick, Murray Gold, Next person that says inveigle gets a punch to the mouth, Not as racist as most racist X-Files eps, Obfuscate, Panpipes of xenophobia, Paralysed Juicebox People, Powder, PUT THAT EVIDENCE DOWN, Racism, Robin Burdge, Robin is going to make painful Alias jokes until we die and come back as Russian zombies in a convoluted season finale that even Damon Lindeloff will make fun of, Robin lost his virginity in that fountain... by himself, Samuel Aboah, Scully is Jessica Fletcher #MurderMagnet, Seriously? Inveigle? REALLY?, So nobody is gonna talk about his crazy stretchy powers. Fair enough, Spirits of the air, Squeeze, Stop eating in the autopsy room, Stop trying to sexually assaulting Cobrakai, Tammy Ginader, Terrible Michael Jackson Joke, The best part of waking up... AHHHHHH! THERE'S A GUY IN MY COFFEE CAN! Too black for the X-Files, The Flight Attendant, The Strike, The worst acting Gillian Anderson has ever done, Throat boner, ventilation shimmy scenes, Walter Skinner, What the fuck is a spirit?, Why would you cover up a murder caused by a spooky scary monster that you are afraid of? You don't help things that you are afraid of, wiki-fountain.com, Willie Amakye, WTF were you doing in that autopsy Scully?, X-Files, xfiles, Yo bus driver? If Dude doesn't want to get on your bus why are you yelling at him?, Zakes Mokae

Guys if you’ve been waiting for an actually scary episode this is it! DJ_J-Pope_Jonny_Jon_Jon rolls out from his hidey hole to discuss the creepo monster episode ‘Home’. Where the monsters are monsters and the police are shockingly incompetent. Millennium descends into full-on Chris Carter dialogue and somehow the wife and daughter are still alive.

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Where there are no monsters under our beds.

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Listen to Episode 4×02 – 1:59:52

Tags: A black sheriff in a small town definitely locks his doors, A dark and stormy night, Adrian G. Griffiths, Adrian Huges is a rapist and sex offender, All the juices, American Civil War, Amputee, Aubrey, Babe, Baltimore, Barney Fife, Batman escape, Baywatch Nights, Bill Smitrovich, Brad Cupples, Bring it Home to Mamma, Brittany Tiplady, Cadillac, Catherine Black, Charlie Chaplin, Chin Music, Chris Carter, Chris Nelson Norris, Claire Laffar, classic = eye roll, Clint Howard is already 50% peacock how was he not in this, Creep Mulder, David Duchovny, Deputy Barney Paster Judith Maxie, DJ_J-Pope_Jonny_Jon_Jon, Don't play near the peacock house, Don't score a corpse in the refrigerator with your lunch, Edmund Peacock, Effective but uncreative mix tapes, Evil Telemarketing Cult, Frank Black, George Peacock, Gillian Anderson, Glen Morgan & James Wong, grossest use of a fork, herda hada herda, hillbillies, Hmmm I never thought of you as having any sort of maternal instincts you frigid harpy, Home, Home Alone, I wish they had muskets, If these yokel cunts would just talk to the authorities everything would have been fine, If this ep freaks you out too much just google Miniature Goldendoodle pictures and all will be well with the world, Inbreeding, incest, Intro to Brisco, Intro to X yuk yuk fest, introtox, introtox.com, It is undeniable that monsters lurk in the south, John Trottier, Johnny Mathis, Jon the wrong, Jordan Black, Karin Konoval, Kevin McCallister tactics, Kill the babies all the babies!, Kim Manners, Lachlan Murdoch, Lance Henriksen, Lieutenant Bob Bletcher, Little Traveler, LOCK YOUR DOORS, LSD, Mayberry, Meckel-Gruber Syndrome, Megan Gallagher, Morgue, Mrs. Barbara Taylor Kenny James, Mulder is a dick, Mulder/David Duchovny gets turned on by pigs, Nev-Laxova Syndrome, No. There's no chance that there's a connection between the monster baby and the house of incest monsters next to where it was found, NOPE!, Nope. Nope. NOPE!!!, oh he was just microwaved a little bit? Well as long as he only has minor CELLULAR DAMAGE I guess he'll be just fine and dandy., Old Men in shitty jackets with uncombed hair, Peacock, Peacock family, Peacock-blocked, Pennsylvania, Pennywise, Peter Watts, Pittsburgh, Put on some pants fool, Radio Singer, Robin Burdge, Scary, Science Fact: Heda Hada yokel cunts LOVE dead Elvis Newspapers, Sebastian Spence, Sheriff, Sheriff Andy Taylor, Sherman Peacock, Sports Facts, Sweetgum Lane, Tammy Ginader, Terry O'Quinn, That baby belongs in the ground, The Andy Griffith Show, The CEO of Hobby Lobby, The first scary X-files Ep, The Peacock Mother, The Rig, the worst cops, There's no turning back when big city Christian arts and crafts magnates start changing things, This ep broke Claire, This sheriff is an idiot, To angry for bullet points, Tucker Smallwood, War of Northern Aggression, We almost Broke Tammy, What happened to the rest of your limbs?, WHEN WILL THIS WIFE AND DAUGHTER BE KILLED, Winky winky, Wonderful Wonderful, X-Files, xfiles

Dave joins us as we kick-off season four if you love word association and/or suffer from insomnia this is the episode for you! We also announce our ‘Introgram X’ Contest and talk about the super creepy pilot of Millenium.

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Where… Facebook –> Social Network –> Network–> Net–> Caught in a net–> Mermaids –> it’s all about mermaids.

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Listen to Episode 4×01 – 2:10:49

Tags: 70 gigs worth of information, A Aromatic Bra Virus, A darker Billy Grahmm, Agent Pendrell, Alberta, Alien Bounty Hunter, Anagrams, Apparently the entire world revolves around Mulder's Mommy, Aryan Children, Assistant Director Walter Skinner, Baywatch Nights 2x02 The Creature, Bees, Bill Smitrovich, Brad Cupples, Brando Guy, Brendan Beiser, Brian Thompson, Brittany Tiplady, Canada, Casaba Trivia Rumor, Catherine Black, Chase scene directed by the creator of 'The Monkey's', Cherry Picker, Child Snatching, Chip, Chris Hansen, Cigarette Smoking Man, Claire Laffar, Clones, Colonization --> Colonoy --> Bee Colony --> Drone --> Clone, Contest, Creighton Dukes, Daughter of Stache, Dave Maresca, David Duchovny, Do they know what the word clone means?, Don S. Williams, Drone Clone, Drones, Everything Dies, Face Touching, First Elder, Frank Black, Garvin Cross, George Cancerman, Gillian Anderson, Ginseng, Gong, Gregor, Grey-Haired Man, Handsome Man, Herrenvolk, Hey Mulder? Maybe don't pour gasoline in your eyes, How long until Frank's wife and daughter are dead? These fools are destined for a refrigerator, Hybrids, I am concrete. I am not honey. No stings., Inserting a serial code in DNA is 100% redundant, Introgram X, introtox, introtox.com, Jeremiah Smith, Jordan Black, Ken Camroux, Lance Henriksen, Laurie Holden, Lieutenant Bob Bletcher, Little Traveler, Marita Covarrubias, Mark Snow's cat fell into a factory of steel drums and randomly assorted pipes, Master Race, Megan Gallagher, Michael David Simms, Millennium, Mitch Pileggi, Morris Panych, Mr. X, Netflix has a secret crush, No One Cares, Paint by numbers, Paul Dillon, Peter Watts, Rebecca Toolan, Remember 'Colony'? Well here it is again, Repairman, Robin Burdge, Roy Thinnes, Rufus, Samantha Mulder, Samurai Vibrato Arc, Scully's first kidnapping of Season 4, Senior Agent, SEP, SeRiouSly Guys?, Skip, Smallpox Eradication Program, Snoozer Files, Some Really Small Guy, Special Agent Dana Scully, Special Agent Fox Mulder, Special Representative of the Secretary General, SRSG, Steven Williams, Stingray, Summary Gong, Swarm, Tammy Ginader, Teena Mulder, Tellus, Terry O'Quinn, The Frenchman, The Honeycombs Hideout, The least sensible chase ever, The most overbearing soundtrack, The weirdest apiary ever, This show is nothing if not completely predictable, This still makes no sense at all, Tiny invisible piano playing, Walking Dead, Why does't the Alien Bounty hunter heal himself or shapeshift into a not-sting-covered-monster, Why isn't the bounty hunter immune to bees, William B. Davis, Word Association with Chris Carter, Words in titles, X-Files, xfiles, You would have heard my eyes rolling if they were still open, ZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZ Spoiler Alert: That's not the sound of bees

DJ Johnny Jon J Jonathon is here to blow our minds as we discuss ‘Wetwired’ an episode in which Scully goes so cuckoo banana cakes crazy that she could be mistaken for Mulder. We also learn about Mulder’s sudden onset color-blindness and the evils of The Little Traveler.

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Where no one trusts Little Traveler.

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Listen to Episode 3×23 – 1:53:52

Tags: 1996 Cable News, Andre Danyliu, Baywatch Nights, Believing your sister was abducted by aliens should be more of a barrier to the FBI than color blindness, Blood, Brad Cupples, Bruce Harwood, Chihuahua Penis, Children are wolves, Chip the cable guy, Chris Carter, Chump Mulder, Cigarette Smoking Man, Claire Laffar, Colin Cunningham, Creighton Dukes, Crystal Verge, DAMN YOU MELISSA SCULLY, Dana Scully, David Duchovny, Dean Haglund, Die Hard, DJ Johnny Jon, Dr. Keanu Shore, Dr. Lorenz, Dr. Stroman, Evil Pendrell, Fox Mulder, George, Gillian Anderson, Insane Pro Mulder + Scully theories, Intro to Ness, introtox, introtox.com, Joe Maffei, John Fitzgerald Byers, Jonathon Pope, Joseph Patnik, L.A. HEAT, Linden Banks, Little Traveler, Margaret Scully, Mat Beck, Melvin Frohike, Mitch Pileggi, Mr. X, Mulder is gross, Mulder's Genie, Plain Clothes Man, Plain-Clothed Man, Remember when that train you were on exploded and there was only that one set of footprints? Mr. X was carrying you dawg, Richard 'Ringo' Langly, Rob Bowman, Robin Burdge, Robin has oddly specific fears, Rufus, Scully goes so crazy she acts like Mulder on a Tuesday, Sheila Larken, Shorter than War and Peace does not qualify as a shorter email., Steven Williams, Steven Williams vs Dr. David Hasselhoff, Stingray, Sunflower Seeds, Supernatural, Tammy Ginader, That's not how color blindness works, That's not how you wash dishes, The bottom of the comedic barrel gets scraped, The Family Ness, The Family Stache, The Lone Gunmen, The most shallow grave, The Prize is Nice, The Salad Days of Jay Leno, Thistle Whistle, Tim Henry, Tom Braidwood, VNN, Walter Skinner, Wetwired, Why are these dummies watching all these tapes?, William B. Davis, X-Files, xfiles, You don't see him but he sees you