Episode 9×16 – William

September 1st, 2016

DJ J-Jon Jonathon and Chris are here to discuss the beautiful tapestry that is 9×16 “William’ Wherein Scully is the worst mom ever with the most questionable logic ever. Despite the unending supply of bullshit that is thrown at him American Hero Jeffrey Spender saves the world yet again. William moves to Brimleytown.

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Where we are taking donations to buy Spender a Lone Gunmen mask.

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Listen to Episode 9×16 – 1:52:35

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We continue onward with Chris Carter’s last minute half-assery in Episode 9×10 – “Providence” wherein nothing reasonable happens. Teliko helps Scully find secret passages and people possibly try to surf on a spaceship. Also this prophesy makes no sense.

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Where we dont turn off hospital monitors.

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Listen to Episode 9×10 – 1:32:59

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Episode 8×15 – Deadalive

March 30th, 2016

Ian joins us for the handiwork of Chris Carter episode 8×15 – “Deadalive”. Mulder’s return from death, autopsy, embalming, and three months in the ground is questionable as Scully 11 month pregnancy. On the plus side Little Doggett and Slycek face off. The Lone Gunmen 1×07 “Planet of the Frohikes” features a talking chimpanzee named Simon White-Thatch Potentloins, and therefore is the best episode of Lone Gunmen ever.

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Where we call sentient intelligent creatures by the name they choose.

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Listen to Episode 8×15 – 1:31:07

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We are here to tell you everything you might need to know about the first 7.25 seasons of The X-Files before it’s inexplicable return. From Conquistador Tree-People to Clone Drone Hybrids this is truly the definite Critical Guide to Characters, Mythology, and Monsters whether you Want To Believe it or not.

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Where Mustache Man is canon.

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Listen to Special Episode – 0:52:06

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Episode 8×02 – Without

December 30th, 2015

Jonathon joins us for Episode 8×02 – “Without” In which Mulder continues to battle the evil table whilst everyone else is trapped in a Benny Hill sketch. We question whether these “Alien Bounty Hunters” are actually bounty hunters and why is Scully turning into the worst?

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Where we all wonder how well we *REALLY* know each other.

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Listen to Episode 8×02 – 1:20:33

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Episode 8×01 – Within

December 23rd, 2015

Happy Kershmas, Friends! Amanda joins us as we embark on Terminator Times and reunite with our cupcake baking hero Alvin Donald Kersh. Filipino chess champ Gibson Praise is back to being the key to everything again. And Mulder endures the terrors of an evil table.

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Where we all wonder how well we *REALLY* know each other.

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Listen to Episode 8×01 – 1:24:50

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Episode 7×22 – Requiem

December 16th, 2015

Jonathon and Paul join us for a farewell to season seven as we Riverdance our way through Episode 7×22 – “Requiem” Scully has a Stingray baby on board and we meet our new favorite character Chesty Short – A True Blue American Hero.

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Where we all welcome the upcomming Terminator Times.

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Listen to Episode 7×22 – 1:53:08

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Episode 7×18 – Brand X

November 18th, 2015

Jonathon and Chris are here to discuss 7×18 – “Brand X” wherein the jigsaw killer plays a game in which he fills people’s lungs with bugs. It’s super gross and we are all upset at the lack of Bambi and George.

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Where if a bug comes out of you you are DONE.

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Listen to Episode 7×18 – 1:50:09

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Alirio and Heidi join us for 6×11 “Two Fathers”. It’s the mythology episode Claire has been begging for! Thrill at the minutes of valuable screen time devoted to an unnecessary exposition monologue! Marvel at the most racially uncomfortable writing sense the last time Chris Carter dared to have a black person in one of his scripts! Rage at the injustices heaped upon Jeff Spender: Champion of the Taxpayer! Agonize over the puzzle of why this episode is called “Two Fathers”. In Millennium 3×08 “Human Essence” Hollis has to clear her name and rescue her illegitimate junkie half-sister from a terrible plot.
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Where words have meanings.

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Listen to Episode 6×11 – 1:56:59

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And now for the shocking conclusion to the two-part body-swap game changer that will truly rock X-Files to its very core… or not. Ian and Matt helps us try to make sense of 6×05 “Dreamland II”. In Millennium 3×02 “Exegesis” The groups shades of gray begin to evaporate as they try to turn the show into the X-Files.

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Where we reiterate no one is allowed use someone else’s penis without permission.

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Listen to Episode 6×05 – 1:55:51

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