Chris Joins for 5×15 “Travelers” an episode with all the trappings of boring fanfiction and the lamest unnecessary explanation for why they are called “X-Files” imaginable. An epic West Side Story Battle between Owls and Roosters begins on Millennium 2×15 “Owls”.

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Where Roy Cohn is always the monster.

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Listen to Episode 5×15 – 1:50:28

Tags: 5&2, A Christmas Story, Angels, Arthur Dales, Bartender, Boring, Brad Cupples, Brian Leckner, Brittany Tiplady, Catherine Black, Chevy Chase, Claire Laffar, Claire sets the boundaries on when xmas ends, Clear Knight, Coroner, Cory Dagg, Dana Scully, Darren McGavin, David Duchovny, David Fredericks, David Moreland, Dean Aylesworth, Doctor Who: The Eleventh Hour Podcast, Dorothy Bahnsen, Edward Skur, Eileen Pedde, Eric W. Gilder, Esophagus Spiders, FBI Director, Fox Mulder, Frank Black, Fredric Lane, Fuck Babyboomers, Fuck David Duchovny for making me take Chris Carter's side in an argument, Garret Dillahunt, Gillian Anderson, Glen Morgan, Hayes Michel, I do not understand this elaborate owl/rooster plot, I would be much more likely to believe Millennium was moving towards a movie than X-Files right now, introtox, introtox.com, J. Douglas Stewart, J. Edgar Hoover, James Wong, Jane Perry, Jets, JFK, Joe & Chris Do a Thing, John Lackland is History's Greatest Schmuck, Jordan Black, Kimberly Patton, Kristen Cloke, Lance Henriksen, Landlord, Lara Means, Look Honey I'm a Dragon Our Daughter Sees Angels And you work for straight up nazis., Magic Jeezo Wood, Malcolm Stewart, Maryland, Megan Gallagher, Millennium, Mitchell Kosterman, Mr. Johnston, Mrs Skur, old Edward Skur, Owls, Peter Watts, Peter Watts: Professional Creep, R. G. Armstrong, Richard I was the worst, Roger Haskett, Roosters, Roy Cohn, Sharks, Sheriff, So pops Mulder just let a guy keep killing people for all those decades? Cool guy, Space, Space Spiders, Taliens, Tammy Ginader, Terry O'Quinn, The Last Word: a Press Gang Introcast, The Old Man, The Unusual Suspects, Thomas J. Wright, Travelers, umm Watts? could you at least leave a note that you were skulking about in the shadows on my front door?, West Side Story, When your an owl your an owl all the way, Why are there solved cases in the same cabinet with unsolved cases, Why isn't Mulder the least bit interested in SPACE SPIDERS?!?, Why would you file unsolved cases under "U"?, X-Files, xfiles, young Arthur Dales, Young Bill Mulder

Moira is here to chill with us for 4×19 “Synchrony” in which a grumpy old time traveler goes on a surprisingly spry killing spree whilst trying to avoid bursting into flames. The shocking episode Millennium 1×18 “Lamentation” keeps us on the edge of our seats and we give a sigh of relief that perennial everyman Detective Sandwich/KimmyGibblerHaus is ok.

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Where we’re too cool 4 time travel school.

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Listen to Episode 4×19 – 1:42:06

Tags: Agent Cuevas, Agent Pierce, Alex Diakun, Alison Matthews, All the Mulder's and Scully's in Millennium, an Elderly Man, Andrew Airlie, Angel, Aureleo Di Nunzio, Back to the Future rules of time travel temperature, Bill Smitrovich, Blechly Mountain home of the Black Dragons, Bletch, Brad Cupples, Brent Chapman, Brittany Tiplady, Catherine Black, Chaos theory Shmaos theory... I'm going to try and finish this script in time to take a nap at 2:30pm --Howard Gordon, Chicken Broth, Chris Carter, Chuck Lukerman, Claire is not a chump. A loser? Yes. But NOT a Chump, Claire Laffar, Coroner, CryoBiology, Dana Scully, Darin Morgan's BFF, David Duchovny, David Greenwalt, David MacKay, Demolition Man, Desk Clerk, Det. Bob Giebelhouse, Detective, Detective KimmyGibblerHouse, Detective Sandwich, Did Catherine miss the stranger putting a kidney in the fridge?, Did he have plastic surgery before travelling back in time?, Doctor, Don't go to hotels with unidentified strangers, Dr. David Hasselhoff listening to dust, Dr. Ephraim Fabricant, Dr. Willmore, Dr. Yonechi, Federal Marshall, Fishercast, Fox Mulder, Freezing, Fuck yall lazy chumps, Gillian Anderson, Grow Up. Shut Up. Get a better society going. Fuck off. #VoteCupples #PartyPlatform, Hiro Kanagawa, Howard Gordon, I Fall To Pieces, I just want to read this thesis. WHAT IS THIS NEW INTERPRETATION OF THE TWIN'S PARADOX? WHAT IS THERE TO BE INTERPRETED?, I want to watch Frank Blank and Fox Mulder in a Profiler-off and pie eating contest at the FBI picnic, If Jason had lived he would have eventually developed upper body strength, introtox, introtox.com, It's not that hard to write time travel stories if you put forth a little bit of effort... or ya know... any effort, It's shocking how little effort they put into research, James Charleston, Jane Perry, Jason Nichols, Jed Rees, Jon and Dr. Yonechi sitting in a tree..., Jonathan Walker, Jordan Black, Joseph Puqua, Kidney snatching, Kurt Max Runte, lamentation, Larold, Least effective way to keep a guy from getting hit by a bus ever, Lisa Ianelli, Lt. Bob 'Bletch' Bletcher, Lucas Menard, Lucy Butler, Massachusetts Institute of Technology, Maybe save your kid instead of hanging out in the basement, Megan Gallagher, Michael David Simms, Michael Fairman, Millennium, Mulder's Geanie is putting in overtime x100 this week, Next Level Geritol, Nino Caratozzolo, Nobody else seems to be interested in stopping the creation of time travel. Jason is just a prick, Nooooooo not Bletch, Norman Armour, Note that Lisa doesn't come back in time to stop her self, Outbreak, Pathologist, Patricia Idlette, Peter Watts, Pleat-watch, Possibly the best thing Chris Carter has/will ever write, Robin Burdge, Sarah-Jane Redmond, Security Cop, Six Feet Under, Smallville, So did your fear of fire come back all of a sudden or is there a reason you aren't using that fire extinguisher?, So they freeze him to absolute zero then shoot him into a wormhole? What?, Special Agent Tom Babich, Spontaneous Human Combustion, Stephen J. Lang, Stop trying to spoil Millennium Claire!, Super Creepy Millennium, Susan Lee Hoffman, Synchrony, Tammy Ginader, Teliko, Terry Arrowsmith, Terry O'Quinn, The Servant, They don't understand what freezing means, This freeze thing should make a proper thwppp sound, This is a hugely questionable leap in logic, This is dumb, Those sure do look like ice crystals, Throat boner, Time Travel, Uniformed Cop, Who the fuck is this asshole to decide if the world is a better or worse place with/without time travel, Winrich Kolbe, Wormhole, X-Files, xfiles

Bob joins us as we watch Mulder lose his mind and commit all the fireable offenses he can think of in “Paper Hearts”. Where instead of following logic or law he follows his laser light dreams and the claims of child-molesting serial killers. In Millennium we follow some Missouri-Dirt-Water-Herda-Haddas as they track down a baby that got sold for a television.

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Where no one will buy vacuum’s from a door to door salesman.

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Listen to Episode 4×10 – 1:52:46

Tags: "Children are like currency these days" --Chris Carter spouting nonsense as per usual, "I profiled you. Maybe some connection was created between us. And through it you pilfered my memories of Samantha." ...Seriously?, "You Stupid son of a bitch! You liar!", 1996 Internet, A shameful 41.1 second synopsis., Alice in Wonderland, Angel, Angry Skinner is the best Skinner, Arkansas Trooper Flanagan, Assistant Director Walter Skinner, Badass Stingray, Bill 1% Mulder, Bobby Webber, Brad Cupples, Breaking News: Family of Pickpockets' daughter is kidnapped. Egg on their face this time, Brittany Tiplady, But he's losing his job... right?, Byrne Piven, Caitlin Ross, Captain Bigelow, Carly McKillip, Catherine Black, Chi-Mo, Chris Hansen, Claire Laffar, Dana Scully, David Duchovny, Day Care Operator, Destruction of Evidence, Dirt Water Missouri Forrest Gump, Don't quote Mulder. You are better than that Scully., Dreams, Edward Diaz, El Camino Owner, Fabric Hearts, Fox Mulder, Frank Black, Frank Sparks, Frohike has a wife? This is the true X-File, Fuck this shitty prison guard I hope he was fired, Fuck you West Virginians, Gillian Anderson, gross toothfairy pocket, Heather McComb, How did the bodies completely decay completely down to bone but the clothes are still fully intact?, How is this woman in Millennium in jail and Mulder is still free?, If he sold pops Mulder a vacuum and has this super detailed memory why doesn't he realize they are at the wrong house?, introtox, introtox.com, James Gallanders, Jane Perry, Jeffrey Donovan, Jeremy Piven's dad, Jim Gilroy / Jake Waterston, John Lee Roche, John Pyper-Ferguson, John Tierney, Jordan Black, Krycek in a tree with a laser pointer, Lance Henriksen, Local Cop, long con child snatching, Mad Hat, Maddie Haskell, Mark Snow's kooky Emmy Award Nominated Nonsense, Martha's Vineyard, Megan Gallagher, Michael Hogan, Millennium, Missouri State Trooper, Mitch Pileggi, Mulder Genie, Mulder is touching a lot of bones in the autopsy room, nexus of nonsense, No one would be suprised if Lance Henriksen turned into a dragon one day would they?, Nope. Nope. NOPE!!!, Not quite sweeps-worthy, Oy this is dumb, Paper Hearts, Paul Bittante, Peter Watts, Preds, Rebecca Toolan, Rob Bowman, Robin Burdge, Robo-Fairy, Robocop II, Roche looked up Mulder's geocities page on webcrawler, selling a kid for a TV, Serial Killer, So apparently everything Mulder has learnt about his sister up to now is out?, So Mulder loses his job after this. right?, Sometimes... dead is better, Steve Makaj, stop smirking at the guy who's daughter and wife are dead you asshole, Stop touching that skeleton, Tammy Ginader, Tax dollars at work, Team Sculray 4Ever, Teena Mulder, Terry O'Quinn, The DexterCast, The Magician, The Wild and the Innocent, There is a shocking lack of paper hearts in this ep, There's a Leprechaun Vaccine in that old vacuum, Tom Noonan, Trolly Car Graveyard, Trust Noonan, Vanessa Morley, Vince Gilligan, Wacky Mustache Fight, Weirdest laugh and hug ever, What will Mulder do now that he has been fired?, wrong house, X-Files, xfiles, You can't just arbitrarily destroy somebody's property on a whim, You can't punch prisoners, Young Samantha Mulder