DJ J-Jon Jonathon and Chris are here to discuss the beautiful tapestry that is 9×16 “William’ Wherein Scully is the worst mom ever with the most questionable logic ever. Despite the unending supply of bullshit that is thrown at him American Hero Jeffrey Spender saves the world yet again. William moves to Brimleytown.

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Where we are taking donations to buy Spender a Lone Gunmen mask.

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Listen to Episode 9×16 – 1:52:35

Tags: Adam Nelson, Annabeth Gish, Baby William, Brad Cupples, Burning sheets, Chris JC, Chris Owens, Claire Laffar, Cupcakes, Cyd Strittmatter, Dana Scully, Daniel Miller, David Duchovny, DNA, Dr. Edwards, Gillian Anderson, Harsh Realm, House of D, How would he be shorter, introtox, introtox.com, It's a bad day for Doggett, James Riker, Jay Leno Fashions, Jeffrey Spender, John Doggett, Jonathon Pope, Kersh, Ma and Pa Kent, Mitch Pileggi, Monica Reyes, Mr. Van De Kamp, Mrs. Van De Kamp, Robert Patrick, Scully is the worst mother, Shannon Hile, Stranger Danger, Super Soldiers, Tammy Ginader, The Breather, Travis Riker, Walter Skinner, William, X-Files, xfiles

We continue onward with Chris Carter’s last minute half-assery in Episode 9×10 – “Providence” wherein nothing reasonable happens. Teliko helps Scully find secret passages and people possibly try to surf on a spaceship. Also this prophesy makes no sense.

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Where we dont turn off hospital monitors.

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Listen to Episode 9×10 – 1:32:59

Tags: Aliens, Annabeth Gish, Brad Cupples, Brad Follmer, Chris Carter, Claire Laffar, Clone Drones, Damien Darhk, Dana Scully, David Duchovny, Drunk Reyes, Gillian Anderson, Harsh Realm, Hybrids, introtox, introtox.com, Jim from Neighbors, John Doggett, Kersh, Monica Reyes, Nonesense, Prophecy, Providence, Robert Patrick, Spaceship, Super Soldiers, Tammy Ginader, Teliko, There might or might not be a bonus episode coming in a few days fans of Robert Patrick James Garner and genital replacing aliens will be excited., Toothpick Man, Trashcan Man is THE BEST, UFO Cult, William, X-Files, xfiles

Jonathon and Chris are here to discuss 7×18 – “Brand X” wherein the jigsaw killer plays a game in which he fills people’s lungs with bugs. It’s super gross and we are all upset at the lack of Bambi and George.

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Where if a bug comes out of you you are DONE.

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Listen to Episode 7×18 – 1:50:09

Tags: A Bug's Life, all things, Alvin Donald Kersh, Anne Voss, Arthur Rosenberg, Ashman, Bambi?, Bang the memories out, Batteries Not Included, Beetlejuice, Beetles, biochemist, Bitch Wife, Brad came across the greatest xfiles spoiler ever, Brad Cupples, Brand X, Bug Theme Parks, Bugs, Caryn West, Children of the Corn, Chim Cheroo, Chris JC, Cigarretes, Claire Laffar, completely unnecessary violence, Corn Man A Comin', coughing, Creep, Daisy Kersh, Dana Scully, Daniel Brimley, Daniel son of Wilford, Darryl Weaver, David Brimley, David Duchovny, David Duchovny has to stop improvising lines, David Sawyer, David Son of Wilford, Dennis Boutsikaris, Destro, DJ Jonny Jon Jon J Pope, Doctor, Doctor Who: The Eleventh Hour Podcast, Dr. Jim Scobie, Dr. Libby Nance, Dr. Peter Voss, E pluribis unum, face eaten, Fox Mulder, George, Gillian Anderson, Greg Poland, Gross, Harsh Realm, If you lungs filled with bugs you are dead, infestation, insectoids, introtox, introtox.com, Jesse Ventura, Joan Scobie, Jonathon Pope, Kermit, Kersh, Kim Manners, Lead Counsel, Michael Hungerford, Mitch Pileggi, Morley Cigarettes, panic attack, Pat Destro, Press Gang, Reptoids, Richard Cox, Rick Deats, robots, Ron Marasco, Saw, Schrodinger's Fuck, ScienceFacts, Season of the Witch, Second Windbreaker Man, Security Man, Shannon O'Hurley, Silver Shamrock, Smoking like a chimney, So no one checked that glass? Cool., Son, sooo it's not a tobacco beetle at all then? Cool., Spender, Stingray Side eye, Suicide, Tammy Ginader, Tammy Nightmares, Teenser Hitler, Teliko, Terror, The first windbreaker man died 25 yrs ago this very night, The Insider, The Jigsaw Killer, The Mummy, The Pretender, These Transcript writers are going crazy, Thomas Gastall, Thumbs-Up Dog, tobacco beetle, Tobin Bell, Transcript writers working that local flavor, Walter Skinner, Wash your shirt you gross fucks, We're just waiting for Terminator times, Where the fuck was Dr. Bambi, Where the wild things are, WHY ARE THERE SO MANY BEETLES EVERYWHERE?, Why are you giving him money?, Wilford Brimley, witness protection, X-Files, xfiles, You can find Jonathon right here... in these very tags!, ‎THE LAST WORD: A Press Gang Introcast with Chris and Alirio

Will and Mike are here for sexist video game nonsense on 7×13 – “First Person Shooter” an episode that breaks new ground for incompetence and bumbling ineptitude in the fields of writing and directing. Also why is she sleeping? Harsh Ream 1×09 “Donezo: The Final Indignity” is the last one.

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Where we will never discuss Harsh Realm again.

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Listen to Episode 7×13 – 1:49:14

Tags: accused of murder, Alabama Hot Pocket, autopsy, backflip, Billy Ray Gallion, BitchJerk Podcast, blast the crap out of stuff, Brad Cupples, Bruce Harwood, Cake in shorts, character says bring it on, checking shorts for cake, Chris Carter, Christopher Ng, Claire Laffar, Constance Zimmer, Cyber Punk, Dana Scully, Darryl Musashi, David Duchovny, Deadwood, Dean Haglund, Detective Lecoeur, Down Below: A Babylon 5 IntroCast, Ethics in Videogames Journalism isn't a thing, First Person Shooter, Fourvel, Fox Mulder, FPS, Fuck Gamergaters, Fuck Those Gamergate Assholes, gamer, Gillian Anderson, gold! Gold! GOLD!, gratuitous virtual mayhem, Harsh Realm, held at gunpoint, How do you have FBI agents sign an NDA for a murder investigation, How long has this guy been dead?., How long was the body there, interrogation, introtox, introtox.com, Ivan Martinez, Jade Blue Afterglow, James Geralden, James Marsh, Jamie Marsh, John Fitzgerald Byers, John Marrott, Krista Allen, Laser Tag, Lo-Fat, Lora Croft is a criminal suspect, Lost Boys, Maitreya, Matthew Sutherland, Melvin Frohike, Michael Bower, Michael David, motorcycle, Moxie, narrated by character, nerd, non disclosure agreement, Nonsense Talk, OG, Original Guru, Phoebe, Records Clerk, retina scan, Retro, Richard 'Ringo' Langly, Ryan Todd, Security Guard, severed hand, sexist, Shockingly incompetent directing, Skyrim Addict Podcast, sleeping on the job, Sphinx, STOP SENDING PEOPLE INTO VIDEO GAMES AFTER PEOPLE DIED IN THE VIDEO GAME, Tammy Ginader, testosterone frenzy, The Chatter Box Podcast, The Great One, The Lone Gunmen, The script for this ep is problematic to say the least, The worst game ever, There were more tags but the power went off and they went away, This is better than 'Space' I TOLD YOU ALL!, This is the worst game ever, title spoken by character, Tom Braidwood, Tom Maddox, Video Games, virtual reality, western town, Whack a mole, What the fuck is happening?, What We Make: A Terminator Podcast, who is the paint for?, Why are they wrapping bodies in bubble wrap, Why is this?, WHY WAS SHE ASLEEP, Will Johnson, William Gibson, X-Files, xfiles, ya yas

Chris attempts to join us before the harsh realm swallows him whole as we discuss 7×12 – “X-Cops” in which we meet our new favorite characters but get robbed of the chance to meet a wasp-man. Harsh Ream 1×08 “garbage o’clock: countdown to cancellation” was broadcast. Also we get the most questionable email ever.

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Where we WILL NOT let Harsh Realm defeat us.

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Listen to Episode 7×12 – 1:32:39

Tags: 9 mm bullet, ambulance, audio censor, autopsy, baby, Bad Boys, bathroom, Better Opening Credits, Brad Cupples, Buffy the Vampire Slayer, camera crew, Cameraman, censor, Chantara Gomez, Cheetara, Chris Carter, Chris JC, Claire can't be bothered, Claire Laffar, claw mark, Closure, Coroner's Assistant, Coward Cop, Crackhead, crime scene, crossover episode, Curtis C., Curtis Jackson, Daniel Emmett, David Duchovny, Dee Freeman, Deputy, Deputy Keith Wetzel, Doctor Who, Doctor Who: The Eleventh Hour Podcast, Don't write about TV shows or Comic Books for a College Thesis, drag queen, Edy, fingernail, flashlight, Frankie Ray, Freddy Kruger, full moon, Gillian Anderson, Harsh Realm, homosexual, house cat, hysterical female, introtox, introtox.com, J.W. Smith, John Michael Vaughn, Judson Mills, Kevin L. Beggs, Lifeline, Lombardo Boyar, los angeles california, María Celedonio, Mexican Lady, Michael W. Watkins, Pennywise the Clown, Perla Walter, pink hair, police patrol, Press Gang, screaming man, Sgt. Paula Duthie, Sheriff #6, silhouette against the moon, Soundman, Spanish Speaking Deputy, Steve, Steve & Edy 4Ever, Tammy Ginader, Tara Karsian, tattoo, Technical Issues, The bastard son of a 100 in-jokes, The Game Changer, The Last Word Podcast: a Press Gang Introcast, The Pretender, This Year's Girl, Vince Gilligan, We denounce and reject Jon, Werewolf, whatabitch, whatajerk, witness, X-Cops, X-Files, xfiles

Remember those grieving parents suspected of killing their children and leaving spooky ransom notes? Neither does Chris Carter. But luckily we get yet another resolution to the Samantha Mulder story that we’ve been told we’re supposed to care about in 7×11 – “Closure” Now with 500% more star rapturing? Harsh Ream 1×07 “42 wasted minutes of our lives” is…

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Where Star Rapture is never an acceptable solution, no matter how unnecessary the problem is.

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Listen to Episode 7×11 – 1:22:13

Tags: "Brave", #TeamSpender, Agent Schoniger, All the David E. Kelly shows, Amber-Lynn LaPierre, Anthony Heald, Any explanations for the walk-in ransom notes?, apparition, April Base, Arbutus Ray, Awaiting Terminator Times, bedtime prayer, Brad Cupples, Brad is heavily medicated throughout this ep, Buffy the Vampire Slayer, burning a photograph, Candlepower Contest, CGB Spender, Chester George Bonaparte Spender, child killer, Cigarette Smoking Man, Claire Laffar, Closure, Cold Dick, continued from previous episode, Dana Scully, David Duchovny, death of mother, Ed Truelove, Evil Leapers, exhumation, felt tip pen, Fox Mulder, Get the fuck out of here Teena, Ghost Children, Gillian Anderson, Goodbye Iowa, Harold Pillar, Harold Piller's son, Harsh Realm, I bet Kim Manners could have gotten those birds to sing by yelling at them, introtox, introtox.com, John Bisom, Let it go, Lukewarm Skim Milk Riley, Megan Corletto, Mimi Paley, Mitch Pileggi, Mrs. Teena Mulder, Mulder is an asshole, narrated by character, News Anchor #2, Nicolas Stratton, Patience Cleveland, Pennywise the Clown, Planet of the Apes, Quantum Leap, Rad new intro themes, Randall Bosley, ransom note, Raptured into stars, Rebecca Toolan, reference to santa claus, reindeer, sacramento california, Samantha Mulder, Scandal!, Serial Killer, Silence of the Lambs, Sneaky Ghost Whispers, So many unimportant scenes, Stanley Anderson, Stop overprotecting children, Tammy Ginader, That Hair!!!!, The Forbidden Zone, The Pretender, This book is written by lunatics, This is garbage, This is shockingly unnecessary, Thumbs-Up Dog, title spoken by character, turned into stars, unmarked grave, Walter Skinner, What the fuck is a walk-in, WHY ARE THERE RANSOM NOTES?, Wild Predicaments, William B. Davis, X-Files, xfiles, year 1979

We say goodbye to Teena Mulder (hopefully for good this time) in 7×10 – “Sein und Zeit” Mulder is a selfish prick that delays a kidnapping case so as to make sure the world continues to revolve around himself. We try to figure out what the fuck a walkl-in is and Harsh Ream 1×06 “Somehow still being broadcast” occurred.

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Where shifty Santas are always suspect.

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Listen to Episode 7×10 – 1:42:08

Tags: Brad Cupples, Claire Laffar, David Duchovny, Gillian Anderson, Harsh Realm, introtox, introtox.com, Sein und Zeit, Tammy Ginader, X-Files, xfiles

Evangeline and Alex join us for a real “Oh no… Copperheads!!” situation in 7×09 – “Signs & Wonders” in which Mulder and Scully meet The Devil who is a snake… again. And a grip of creepo Jeezos deliver snake babies. We question how eyeballs work in Harsh Ream 1×05 “More of the Same – Part 7” which, believe it or not, was actually put on television.

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Where we are all proud and fancy free.

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Listen to Episode 7×09 – 1:54:12

Tags: 'Til Death Do Us Part, 5&2, Alexander Green, Alvin Donald Kersh, Anaconda, Angel, animal torture, Beth Grant, Between 6 and 50? Why is that range so huge? How many did you lose, Black Mamba, Boom Mic guy, Brad Cupples, california gray rat snake, Cat Saliva, Check it out... Evangeline is here!, Chris Carter Civil War Letters, church, Claire Laffar, Clement Blake, Daisy Kersh, Dan Manning, Dana Scully, David Duchovny, Deputy, Devil Snake Pregnancy, Doctors jealous of gods, Don't watch Harsh Realm, Donna May, Elderly Woman, Elyse Donalson, EMT, Enumeration Podcast, Eric Nenninger, Evangeline Spachis, Evangeline the Snake, Eyes are not portals to video games, Fox Mulder, Fun Fact: Alex was also in the same Clown Troupe as me. We did Birthday parties together. #MagiciansCanEatADick, fundamentalism, Fundamentalists try not to be more moral than their religion, Gillian Anderson, God Hates Goldilocks, Gracie O'Connor, Harsh Realm, His father was a snake, Holy Spirit Man #1, Holy Spirit Man #2, Holy Spirit Woman #1, hunting knife, incest, introtox, introtox.com, Iris Finster, Jared Chirp, Jeezo, Jigsaw, King Hiss, locked in a car, Luckily most people are more moral than their religion, Lumber Camp, Michael Childers, Middle Aged Woman, Oh no... Babies!!!, Oh no... Copperheads!!!, Pa Progress, Philip Lenkowsky, Phyllis Franklin, Pretending, Proud and fancy free, quotation from revelations, Ramjack Podcast, Randy Oglesby, rattlesnake, religious cult, Reptile Saliva, Reverend Enoch O'Connor, Reverend Samuel Mackey, Sadsack Gracie, Signs & Wonders, snake bite, Snake Venom is the villain of Snake Spiderman, Snakes are not fashion accesories, Snakes in Makeup Chairs, Snakes loves raves, Snowglobe, Sparkle Motion, Stevie Johnson, Stop bellydancing with snakes, Sugar Sugar Time!, Sugar Time!, Tammy Ginader, Tammy Hates Fake People, Teliko, Tennessee... sounds mediocre at best, That's not how eyes work, The Devil, The Devil is less creepy than these creepo jeezos, The Kersh Files, The Pretender, Thumbs-Up Dog, thunderstorm, title spoken by character, TN flashbacks, Tracy Middendorf, Wes Craven's New Nightmare, white mouse, X-Files, xfiles

Heidi and DJ Jon Jonny J Jonathon are here to help us discuss 7×08 – “The Amazing Maleeni” Wherein some asshole magicians pull a heist, Mulder sends an innocent man to prison, and Scully continues to have the worst taste in men. Harsh Ream 1×04 “Enter Shitty Title Here” is somehow even less significant than usual.

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Where we all are ready to follow General Pennywise in the great war against the Magicians.

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Listen to Episode 7×08 – 1:39:49

Tags: Albert Pinchbeck, amusement park, Antonio Salieri, applause, Are you OK Scully? Yikes, armored car, Autopsy Museum, Bank Officer, Billy LaBonge, Bob the Caretaker, Brad Cupples, Bullethead, camcorder, card trick, CastleCast, celebracadabra, Chris Carter, Cissy Alvarez, Claire Laffar, Clowns, Clowns v Magicians, Courier-Guard, cups and balls trick, Dana Scully, David Copperfield, David Duchovny, David Mamet, Dennis Keiffer, Don't touch people's noses it's gross, Dr. Funnbone, electronic money transfer, Employee, ferris wheel, Fox Mulder, framed for robbery, Frank Spotnitz, Fuck Magicians, gambling debt, Gillian Anderson, Giovanni Bartolomeo Bosco, glock 17, Harsh Realm, Harsh Realm is garbage, Hats filled with animal excrement, Heidi Jenkins, Herman Pinchbeck, introtox, introtox.com, J. David, John Shiban, Jon ≠ a Magician, Jonathan Levit, Jonathon Pope, king of diamonds, Long Con, magic trick, Magical Chump, Magicans are the worst, Magician, Magician Memories, man in a wheelchair, Mark Chaet, Max Malini, mini van, misdirection, Mulder is an idiot, Mulder sends an innocent man to prison, neck brace, prestidigitation, Ricky Jay, Robert LaSardo, Rules of Engagement, Scully has the worst taste in dude, severed head, Sherri Howard, Smug thieves, Steven Barr, Tammy Ginader, Teliko, Terrible CGI, The Amazing Maleeni, The Magician, The Pretender, THE WORST, The Worst Dudes, The worst heckler, They did not stop them, Thomas J. Wright, title spoken by character, tuxedo, twin brother, U.S. Prisons are not a safe place for a man named cissy, Vince Gilligan, Windows 10 ghosts, Wizards, Wolfgang Amadeus Mozart, X-Files, xfiles, year 1795, Young Boss

DJ Jon Jonny J Jonathon joins us for the return of Donnie Pfaster in 7×07 – “Orison”. In which Scully hears a song three times thus proving ??? majicks? Reverend Hershal drills a hole in his head to get hypnosis powers as part of a plan to murder murderers for Baby Jeezo. Harsh Ream 1×03 “Title I Still Can’t Be Bothered to Look Up” is a complete waste of time.

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Where we can all agree hypnosis powers are not worth a hole in the head.

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Listen to Episode 7×07 – 1:54:40

Tags: 666, 6:66 am, All the candles, all the shampoo bottles, Blueberry, Blueberry is the polar opposite of the head guy from last week, bound and gagged, Brad Cupples, Brigham, bubble bath, Cake, Call Girl, Can we all agree Blueberry is the greatest character name ever, character name in title, Chip Johannessen, Chris Carter, Claire Laffar, consciousness, Dana Scully, David Duchovny, Did the call girl put the robe on him?, distraction, Don't Look Any Further, Donald Addie Pfaster, Donnie Pfaster should be in a donut shop swapping stories about his dealings with mankind, Doomed, Emilio Rivera, Eric Buker, escape from prison, Everyone's a murderer here, Extra blood in the brain... really?, FBI Agent, fetishist, Fox Mulder, Gillian Anderson, Gloy Amen, Guard, Harrisburg Pennsylvania, Harry Belafonte, Harsh Realm, Harsh Realm: Civil War Letter Monologue. Put Dog In Danger. Meet New Weird Disposable Character. Get Captured. Vague Mystery Monologue. Easily Escape. Civil War Letter Monologue., Hershel, hit by a car, Hypnosis, I denounce and reject Claire for her defamatory statements against Tangerine from The Garbagepail Kids Movie, I had to re-edit this at the last minute so if it's terrible misedited I denounce and reject myself, industrial accident, introtox, introtox.com, Irresistible, IS IT MORNING?, IS IT NIGHT?, Jeezo, John Hyatt, kneeling, latex gloves, Lisa Arch, Lisa Kushell, Lyle Lovett, Mama Look A Boo Boo, Marshal, Maybe close your windows if you are always kidnapped, Maybe just rewrite your script once, medical gloves, Mesmer, Mormon Bedtime, Movie Magic, Mulder is a dick, Nick Chinlund, Omar Santiago, Orison, Pennywise's natural hair color is space spider colored, Pfaster Scars, psychology, Rebecca Holland, Remeber when they met THE DEVIL?, Rev. Orison, Rick Cramer, Rob Bowman, rubber gloves, Scott Wilson, Scully the Vampire Slayer, severed finger, Shelf throw!, Shut your mouth!, So in addition to my tags I also copy and paste all the tags from imdb... what is with all the glove tags? Yikes there's some real glove fetishists out there, speech, sterile gloves, Steve Rankin, surgical gloves, Tammy Ginader, Tara Buck, Teliko, The power of the formula compels you, The wiggiest of wigs ever wigged and presumed frontrunning candidate for the reconstituted Whig party, This book is the worst, This guard is a real Scott Walker looking goober, Tip Top Gentleman, title spoken by character, trepanning, U.S. Marshal Daddo, WHAT TIME IS IT?, wig, Wild Child, Windows 10 is haunted, woman in bath, X-Files, xfiles