Episode 4×05 – The Field Where I Died
May 7th, 2014
Matt joins us as we discuss the hilarious pile of garbage/Kristen Cloke demo tape “The Field Where I Died”
Mulder is sacrificing multiple lives in order to try and out-crazy a crazy person whilst pouting his way through a baffling hour of television seemingly made by humans for other humans. Also Millennium continues to be amazing.
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Where David Duchovny’s acting choices are never given a pass.
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Listen to Episode 4×05 – 1:51:56
Tags: 4:27, 522666, Acting Chops, Agent Jack Pierson, Agent Riggins, All characters named Melissa are the worst, American Civil War, Anthony Harrison, Apison Tennessee, Asshole Biddle Bridge, astral projection, ATF, Attorney, BATF Agent, Baywatch Nights, Behold I am life evermore, Billy Crystal, Brad Cupples, Brittany Tiplady, Catherine Black, Chattanooga Tennessee, Child Abuse, Chris Carter, Civil War Trench Bunkers, Claire Laffar, Claire really Mark Snow's the background music on this one, Columbo, Comedy Hijinx, Counting to potato with Fox Mulder, cult, Damon Lindelof and Chris Carter might be the same person. PROVE ME WRONG!, Dangerously disastrous faux medical treatment on an already psychological damaged person, David Duchovny, David Duchovny Cry Face, David Koresh, David Nutter, Donna White, Doug Abrahams, Douglas Roy Dack, Face Touching, Flukeman, Frank Black, Geanie, Gestapo George, Gillian Anderson, Glen Morgan, Gregorian Monk Chants, Harbaugh, Harry Truman, Herda Hada, I Died, Intro to Brisco, introtox, introtox.com, James Wong, Jim Jones, Jimmy Durante, Jonestown Massacre, Jordan Black, Kaboom, Kool-aid, Kristen Cloke, Krycek is the Little Traveler, Lance Henriksen, Les Gallagher, Lilly, Matt Humprey, Megan Gallagher, Melissa Rydell Ephesian, Michael Dobson, Michael Massee, Mighty Man, Mitch Pileggi, Mrs. Doubtfire, Mulder gets a grip of people killed, Mulderpout, multiple personality disorder, Multiple Personality Disorder may, One-Woman Show, Paracelsus, Past Lives, Peter Watts, Psychic Tammy, Regression hypnotherapy is You saw it. You heard it. Why can't you believe it?, Reincarnation, Rob Bowman, Robin Burdge, Robin Williams, Sam Anderson, Scully is getting worn down by all the dumb, Seriously though... what is the deal with the background music?, Seriously?, shirking responsibility to follow idiotic whims, Sidney, So much crazy, Souls aren't a thing, Space: Above and Beyond, Spooky, Tammy Ginader, Temple of the Seven Stars, Terry O'Quinn, That's a ROUGH 25, The Cabin, The Calusari, The Crow, The Field Where I Died, The Mighty Men, The stupidest deleted scenes ever, The ugliest triplets are back, THE WORST, There are 18 minutes cut that they were unable to make room for?, They really thought they were making an award winner on this one, This is clearly just Kristen Cloke's failed MADTV audition. The idea that there could actually be such a thing as a 'failed' MADTV audition is the true X-Files, This is garbage, This is so dumb, Thurston Bane III, TN is a rancid shithole of awful, Transcendence, Trying sooooo hard, Vernon Ephesian, Waco massacre, Walter Skinner, What is up with your rig out ponytail lawyer?, What the fuck is a soul? Somebody differentiate the known emergent property of the brain referred to 'the mind' from a 'soul' in any meaningful way, WHY IS MULDER ASKING QUESTIONS IN THE THERAPY SESSION?, World War II, X-Files, xfiles, ye olde drawer of random loose civil war photos, Yikes... just yikes, You're Dead!
Episode 3×11 – Revelations
December 31st, 2013
Oy. Matt joins us as we scrape the bottom of the bucket and watch the dismal torture ride labeled “Revelations” in which it is revealed that Scully is just as horrifically awful as Mulder and Mulder is a douche in all situations.
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Where no one will touch your mouth.
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Listen to Episode 3×11 – 2:07:52
Tags: "AFFRAID THAT GOD IS SPEAKING BUT NO ONE IS LISTENING" <-- If this weak ass pathetic god can't do better than this I don't care what he has to say, "But miracles are wondrous by nature" <--Convenient. so are shitty fairy tales, "full circle to find the truth" <--FUCK THIS SHIT, "God tests our faith so we may not take it for granted" <--God can go fuck himself, "I believe in the idea that God's hand can be witnessed. I believe he can create miracles" <--WHY?, "Isn't a saint or holy person just another term for someone who's abnormal?" <--NO IT IS NOT., "Miracles need no rationale. No justification" <-- saying stupid things loudly doesn't make them true, "They expect proof for all they see" <--YES, "You must witness the miracles of the Lord without question" <--Fuck that shit, ...Brad is being lazy by just using his notes as the tags because they are plentiful and don't require living through this episode again, 6:18 Ugliest little girl. Awesome flattop+vest kid, according to religious lore there are at any time 12 stigmatics... Really?, ARE THEY REGARDED AS "HAGIOGRAPHIC" FABRICATIONS?!? WORST WRITTEN SENTENCE IN THE SCRIPT, Brad Cupples, Carina Maywald, Chris Carter, Claire Laffar, Dana Scully, David Duchovny, David Nutter, divide 11 into 170? you mean divide 170 by 11. these fucking writers, Don't put your hand on a kids face. gross, Faith is the most useless and idiotic concept ever devised, FBI arrives before mother is informed. AGAIN., Forau, Fox Mulder, FUCK CATECHISM, Fuck the concept of heaven, FUCK YOU MULDER FUCK YOU. YOU DO NOT EAT OFF THE FLOOR. AND YOU CERTAINLY DON'T EAT MYSTERY BLOOD OFF THE FLOOR, Full circle to find the truth = DUMB, Fulvio Cecere, Gillian Anderson, Hagiographic, Hayley Tyson, He's not hiding he's standing behind a branch, HEY MULDER? STOP PUTTING SHIT IN YOUR MOUTH DAWG, High winds and ocean currents didn't part the red sea. It's a myth dummy, How dare people vest themselves in the most practical way to go about understanding the universe we have, How did the FBI get there before his mother?, Intro to Brisco, introtox, introtox.com, Kenneth Welsh, Kevin got his mother killed on purpose, Kevin is a murderer, Kevin Kryder, Kevin Zegers, Kim Newton, Lesley Ewen, maybe check to see if it's a fake blood pack first?, Maybe you should lick the towel Mulder, Maybe you should question his word. especially when it involves kidnapping children, Michael Berryman, Michael Kryder, Mrs. Tynes, Nicole Robert, Owen Lee Jarvis, Priest, R. Lee Ermey, Revelations, Reverend Patrick Findley, Robin Burdge, Sam Bottoms, Scully is the worst Skeptic on the face of the planet. Fuck. This. Shit., Simon Gates, so the villain fell down... great job devil's henchman you failed by FALLING DOWN, So there's an FBI alert about people with real or fake stigmata? and this social worker got it how?, STOP TOUCHING PEOPLE'S MOUTHS!, Story time is the only good thing in this script, Susan Kryder, Tammy Ginader, That bump would be less disastrous than careening off the shoulder. PS she didn't hit her head, The Hills Have Eyes, THE RISING SUN OR BIRTH OF A CHILD ARE NOT MIRACLES YOU STUPID SON OF A BITCH, THIS MAKES NO SENSE, ummm why are they using old timey thermometers and why is it exploding, Were they going to show the sketch to the mother at all?, Why are they taking him into custody? His hands weren't bleeding before he went to school, Why is the sketch so happy?, why would you take temperature for hand wounds?, Windom Earle, Windom Earle begins his reign of killing off all the awesome character actors, WITH THE LORD ANY IDIOTIC PLOT DEVICE IS POSSIBLE, Would you smell Mr. Jarvis?, WTF is the plot here? he has to die for a new age to come? WHAT DOES THAT MEAN, X-Files, xfiles, Yes he does have to go back to the shelter eventually. He's an orphan, you do know the division sign don't you kevin. Worst teacher, You've been tracking a series of religiously based murders and you didn't mention this to your partner?
Episode 3×04 – Clyde Bruckman’s Final Repose
November 13th, 2013
Despite a ton of technical difficulties we successfully thwarted all trickster god shenanigans and recorded this episode. Dan joins us from his doll room to discuss the greatest episode of X-Files ever, “Clyde Bruckman’s Final Repose” We chat about pupper dog, the Truly Stupendous Yappi and his even more stupendous eyebrow waggling, X-Files the musical, and Robin breaks out some voice work to give Duchovny’s Acting chops a run for their money.
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Where technical difficulties will never keep us from talking shit about Chris Carter.
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Listen to Episode 3×04 – 1:41:16
Tags: 10/13... again. oy, 9/11, ABC, Alex Diakun, Always. Be. Closing., Between putting this ep back together and next weeks Project: Stempel I am introtoxed out, Beyond the Sea, Bob Newhart, Brad Cupples, Can I be heard? I WILL BE HEARD!, Carnivale, Chris Carter, Chris Carter talking shit about actors, Christine, Claire Laffar, Claire's Hotmail, Clerk, Clyde Bruckman, Clyde Bruckman's Final Repose, Cold Potato Micropohones, Collecting Dolls is not ok for non-psychopaths, Dan Ginader, Dana Scully, Darin Morgan, David Duchovny, David MacKay, David Nutter, Detective Cline, Detective Havez, Doctor David Hasselhoff and Angie Harmon, Dwight McFee, Everybody Tolerates the Existence of Raymond for a paycheck, Eyebrow waggling, First wikifeet now autoerotic asphyxiation, Flukey, Fox Mulder, Frank Cassini, Fuck riding around on the water, Ghostbusters, Gillian Anderson, Greg Anderson, Head of Lettuce, Hello Yappi!, Hits and Misses for Dummies, How the hell did you assholes run over a dead body, I don't remember him sounding like that, I lost my shoes in a supernatural Double Dare pie situation, IFT, introtox, introtox.com, Jaap Broeker, Just One of the Guys, Karin Konoval, Ken Roberts, Last weak indeed, Laurel and Hardy, Little fat white nazi stormtroopers, Loki'd, Lollapallaaazazao, Madame Zelma, Muppet, Once more with Mulder, Peter Boyle, Photographer, Pleasant Gentleman Psychopaths, Posing with a dead body, Pupper Dog, Puppet, RiptideCast, Robin broke the wheel, Robin Burdge, Robin's amazing vocal character work, Samuri Sword down!, Sarah Charno, Scooter, Scrapbook, Skipping Ahead, Spoilers, Spooky Mulder, Stuart Charno, Tammy Ginader, Tarot, Tarot Dealer, Technical Issues, The Dick Tremayne of X-Files, The Flukeman, The List, The music of the theme of the voice, The Secret, The Stupendous Yappi, Too real Tulips, W.C. Fields, Wacky Death Leg-Kicks, Well deserved awards... for once, While you were sleeping, Worst Fortune Teller Ever, X-Files, X-Filesical, xfiles, Yo Clyde? What the fuck are you chewing on?!? Putrification and Liquiessence, Young Husband
Episode 2×03 – Blood
May 7th, 2013
Happy Cinco de Mayo! Silent co-host Kim unmutes again as we talk about the wackiness that is ‘Blood’ whilst raising our Blood Alcohol Content by playing an introtox drinking game! It’s a super awesome episode so grab some booze and play along if you want to test the amazing recuperative power of the human liver!
Official Introtox Drinking Game Rules
Shot
– Puns / jokes by Robin nobody laughs at
– Any mention of ramjack
– If Man is standing in front of screen appears in Claires DVD menu screen.
– Any time I have to say shut up Robin.
– If we reach 10 pieces of feedback.
– If any voicemail feedback goes over the 5 minute mark
Drink
– Going forward and back
– Puns / jokes by robin
– If there is a connection to Leprachauns… in the hood.
– If Robin tries to justify x-files logic.
– If Brad then corrects Robin with actual logic.
– If we offer up an alternate ending.
– Every time a “fun fact” is brought up about Chris Carter
– Every time we discuss an electronic item getting smashed (as we will be smashed… lame joke)
Be warned: shit is gonna get crazy. Don’t drive or operate heavy machinery whilst playing along. Maybe lock your phone up and send the kids to grandma’s house too.
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It’s like a kegger with aliens and monsters and mediocre actors.
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Listen to Episode 2×03 – 1:42:15
Tags: Aroused 2, Ashlyn Gere, Ballon Hair Mulder, Barman Dan, Blade Runner, Blood, Bonnie McRoberts, BoozeCast, Brad Cupples, Brad then corrects Robin with actual logic, Bruce Harwood, Bumpit: Forever making fools look like Pentecostal weirdos without resorting to skirts made of Jay Leno amounts of denim, Bush Pilots II: Deeper in the Bush, Captain Butt's Beach, Cheeks 5: Cop a Feel, Chris Carter Fun Facts, Cinco de Mayo, Claire Laffar, Cocksmokers 12, Cop Hillarious and Winters, Dana Scully, Darin Morgan, David Duchovny, David Nutter, DDT was banned because of enviornmental effects not because of possible harm to humans, Dean Haglund, DO IT!, Edward Funsch, Electronic Devices Getting Smashed, Extreme Sex 4: The Experiment, Flukey, Fox Mulder, Fun For the Money, George Touliatos, Gerry Rousseau, Gillian Anderson, Glacial Walls of Acting, Glen Morgan, Going forward and back, Good Things Happen When You Stay Drug Free, Gross Nosebleed Kid, Guns are the worst, He-Man-a-phobia, Hilarious rape warnings from machines, House of Whores, Inbox full of Blood, introtox, Ironic Jehovah's witness blood sample collectors, James Wong, John Cygan, John Fitzgerald Byers, Keeping Bread in your refrigerator is not only gross... but also ethically and morally wrong, Kill'em All, KILL'EM!, Kimberley Fowler, Kimberly Ashlyn Gere, Larry Winter, Leprechaun in the Hood, LSDM, Magnifying Glass Use Conspiracies, Man is standing in front of screen in Claires DVD menu screen, Maybe he's scared of Orange Juice, Melvin Frohike, Miami Connection, Monsanto Monsanto Monsanto, Mulder falls down more than a topless teenage girl at Camp Crystal Lake, Newhart, No one uses Spooky the way these fools do, Passing Notes at the X-Files retreat, Pennywise the Clown, Puppy Portraits, Put It in Gere, Ramjack, Richard 'Ringo' Langly, Robin Burdge, Robin tries to justify x-files logic, Scully loses her phone number, Sex 3: After Seven, Shadow People, Sheriff Spencer, Some people just look like victims, Sorority Sex Kittens 2, Subliminal messages are by definition subliminal not superliminal, Subliminal Messaging is not a thing. It's all based on a hoax. That shit has never happened, Tailiens 2, Tammy Ginader, Tequilla, That mechanic could be a maintenance man on Baywatch Nights, The blood alcohol content of this episode is competing with the episode rating, The Lone Gunmen, The One, The Security guard hates people smashing ATMs as much as Mike Huckabee hates everyone that isn't a heterosexual white Conservative Christian male in America of voting age, The United States is conducting terrorism against insects... this will lead to insects arbitrarily attacking other countries with drones, The X-Files, This episode is inspired by 5 and only 5 things, This shit makes no fucking sense at all and I don't give a fuck, Tom Braidwood, Total Reball, Um dawg where'd your sleaves go? Ya know what nevermind... have a scoop of dead flies, We grow apples and cherries therefore we need a giant civic center for our giant wickerman-esque farm conventions, Whackattack 5 Club Head, Who won and who lost cocksmokers 7?, Willard, William Sanderson, xfiles, You're afraid of rape? What a crazy phobia!, “Heart Disease is the number one killer of men in America... OPEN THIS MOTHERFUCKING DOOR!”, “OPEN THIS DOOR... I NEED TO PEEP THOSE TRIGLYCERIDES STAT!”
Episode 1×23 – Roland
April 9th, 2013
Dare gets the unenviable task of joining us to talk about Roland. It’s an episode, and we can all agree to that fact. Hey, remember in the last episode where an innocent person is possessed by a blood-thirsty spirit hell-bent on revenge? This is like that, only somehow less sensible and more offensive in a myriad of ways. We also announce our contest winner! Hurrah for silver linings!
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Where we use 100% of our brains to try and forget this episode.
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Listen to Episode 1×23 – 1:39:43
Tags: "dahhhhhhh!", 70% efficiency in a rocket engine is damn good, Acting Chops, Baby Deep Throat, Baywatch Nights, Beakmans World was a low-rent ADHD Mr. Wizard, Black Lodge Roland, Brad Cupples, Champions Pose Barbie, Chris Hansen, Chris Ruppenthal, Claire Laffar, Claire's old-fashioned monkey shinner tree house dream, Claire's parents being sexist, Confirmation Bias, Dare, David Duchovny, David Nutter, Dead People need to calm the fuck down, Demolition Man, DJ Roomba, Doc Browne Throwdown, Dr. Dick, Dr. Noellete is not an evil villian, Dreams, English Villainy Syndrome, Fanfic Contest Winner Announcement, Frozen head bit outlines, Gillian Anderson, Go Team Venture!, Hard Rock Music, Heroes, Hey writers maybe don't conflate all mental handicaps into one generic half-assed hodge podge of awful, Hi I'd like to hire this mentally challenged person that looks exactly like me to clean up after me, How hard can you really hit someone with a 90s keyboard?, How is neural activity happening in a frozen brain?, Humans use 100% of our brain, I can... when i dream. People can do anything when they dream. Do you have dreams Roland, I'm just protecting the baby, Indiscriminate random killing, introtox, Is it possible the brain is causing the fluctuatuins? NO. Dumbass, Jar-o-Stars, Jason X, Josie isn't real, Lame-o tethered remote control toy cars, Loki'd, Maybe shoot the guy trying to kill you before you get a science boner, Micole Mercurio wall of acting, Mindhunters, Mulder has no more than eight shirts, Mulder's creepy ass dreams, Offensive, Pennywise the Clown, Poor man's George C. Scott, Psychic-frozen-twin-brain might be more ridiculous than souls, R.I.P. Baywatch Nights Week 2013 You are gone but never forgotten, Robin Burdge, Robin isn't big at noticing, Rocket Scientist with the lamest screen name ever, Roland, Rubeehhh!, Scully explains Twins, Scully Pants, Scully's brothers don't need Daddy's approval to live their lives, Shoddily plotted, So no one noticed that one of the scientists and the janitor are IDENTICAL TWINS???, Space Spore, Tammy Ginader, Tammy is the Brock Sampson of the podcast, The Boy Who Could Fly, The most gullible scientist, The X-Files, The-Invisible Jams, Tropic Thunder is the worst, Twins don't have psychic powers, Two people born in Seattle? Impossible, Typing fast enough that beards disapear, Typing fast enough that text comes out handwritten, Umm maybe just stand to the side of the turbine or lie down, Unneceary Flashbacks, Why are they investigating this?, Why does it lock from the outside, Why is there liquid nitrogen in this computer lab?, Worst plot ever, xfiles, You need more than 94% efficency? So you're trying to build a perpetual motion device, Željko Ivanek