Episode 6×17 – Trevor
June 9th, 2015
Jonathon joins us for 6×17 “Trevor” the story of a poor man beaten down by the anti-man femanazi system who gains the power to walk through walls and find clothes that fit vs the dishonorable woman who doesn’t know her place. Millennium 3×14 “Matryoshka” takes us back to 1945 to learn about a Jekyll and Hyde/Incredible Hulk Monster and J. Edgar Hoover’s interaction with the Millennium Group.
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Where shoes and ponchos are base requirements.
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Listen to Episode 6×17 – 2:01:19
Tags: Agent Emma Hollis, Alex Ferguson, Apparently Hillary pretended to have a southern accent... maybe she'll start pretending not to be a war hawk and a extreme corporatist as well, Barbara Bain, boarding up a house, Brad Cupples, Brad really takes it to the Welsh and their aggressively nonsensical use of vowels and consonants, breaking a window, Carbon, Catherine Dent, character name in title, Claire Laffar, Clyde Tolson, Condoms, David Bowe, David Duchovny, David Fredericks, Dirt Shack, DJ Jonny Jon Jon J Pope, Dr. Alexander, Dr. Caton, ET, Frank Black, Frank Novak, Gary Busey, Gillian Anderson, Hey Trev Trev you know how you've got a little pinky? Well here's Daddy Pinky's Pinky, Hider in the house, hit by a car, introtox, introtox.com, It's a dirt shack farm, J. Edgar Hoover, Jackie Gurwitch, Jekyll and Hyde Hulk, John Diehl, John Wick, Jonathon Pope, June Gurwitch, Klea Scott, Lamont Johnson, Lance Henriksen, Lilly Unser, Mark Houghton, Matryoshka, meridian mississippi, Merkel Markel Merkel, Michael Lanyard, Millennium, nail through hand, No body wants to be a Trevor, Ocean Hellman, Peter Hanlon, Peter Watts, Poncho's and shoes at every entrance and exit, prison, Rob Bowman is a sexist douche, Robert Werther, Rubber Bullets, Shinto God of dirt jails, Someone please explain this ET condom joke, Southern names are awful, Spontaneous Human Combustion, Superintendent Raybert Fellowes, Tammy Ginader, telephone booth, Terry O'Quinn, That Wedding Magazine is Upsetting, The 7th Guest, The Pretender, This ep could really use a Gallagher style giant rubber mallet, This Millenium Episode is pretty much an X-Files ep, title spoken by character, Tornado, Trevor, Tuesday Knight, unpaid bill, Walking through walls, Wally Dalton, Whaley, Wilson 'Pinker' Rawls, X-Files, xfiles, Young Lilly Unser
Episode 5×15 – Travelers
December 31st, 2014
Chris Joins for 5×15 “Travelers” an episode with all the trappings of boring fanfiction and the lamest unnecessary explanation for why they are called “X-Files” imaginable. An epic West Side Story Battle between Owls and Roosters begins on Millennium 2×15 “Owls”.
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Where Roy Cohn is always the monster.
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Listen to Episode 5×15 – 1:50:28
Tags: 5&2, A Christmas Story, Angels, Arthur Dales, Bartender, Boring, Brad Cupples, Brian Leckner, Brittany Tiplady, Catherine Black, Chevy Chase, Claire Laffar, Claire sets the boundaries on when xmas ends, Clear Knight, Coroner, Cory Dagg, Dana Scully, Darren McGavin, David Duchovny, David Fredericks, David Moreland, Dean Aylesworth, Doctor Who: The Eleventh Hour Podcast, Dorothy Bahnsen, Edward Skur, Eileen Pedde, Eric W. Gilder, Esophagus Spiders, FBI Director, Fox Mulder, Frank Black, Fredric Lane, Fuck Babyboomers, Fuck David Duchovny for making me take Chris Carter's side in an argument, Garret Dillahunt, Gillian Anderson, Glen Morgan, Hayes Michel, I do not understand this elaborate owl/rooster plot, I would be much more likely to believe Millennium was moving towards a movie than X-Files right now, introtox, introtox.com, J. Douglas Stewart, J. Edgar Hoover, James Wong, Jane Perry, Jets, JFK, Joe & Chris Do a Thing, John Lackland is History's Greatest Schmuck, Jordan Black, Kimberly Patton, Kristen Cloke, Lance Henriksen, Landlord, Lara Means, Look Honey I'm a Dragon Our Daughter Sees Angels And you work for straight up nazis., Magic Jeezo Wood, Malcolm Stewart, Maryland, Megan Gallagher, Millennium, Mitchell Kosterman, Mr. Johnston, Mrs Skur, old Edward Skur, Owls, Peter Watts, Peter Watts: Professional Creep, R. G. Armstrong, Richard I was the worst, Roger Haskett, Roosters, Roy Cohn, Sharks, Sheriff, So pops Mulder just let a guy keep killing people for all those decades? Cool guy, Space, Space Spiders, Taliens, Tammy Ginader, Terry O'Quinn, The Last Word: a Press Gang Introcast, The Old Man, The Unusual Suspects, Thomas J. Wright, Travelers, umm Watts? could you at least leave a note that you were skulking about in the shadows on my front door?, West Side Story, When your an owl your an owl all the way, Why are there solved cases in the same cabinet with unsolved cases, Why isn't Mulder the least bit interested in SPACE SPIDERS?!?, Why would you file unsolved cases under "U"?, X-Files, xfiles, young Arthur Dales, Young Bill Mulder
Episode 4×07 – Musings of a Cigarette-Smoking Man
May 20th, 2014
Ya know that shadowy unnamed villain? How would you like to know all of his secrets? OR what if we waste over 44 min of your life by giving you a ton of garbage that in no way matches up with the show you’ve been watching up to this point? Better yet let’s try and force you to sympathize with him whilst hijacking the murders of actual humans for our shitty TV show. It’s ok we’re baby-boomers we own history and can exploit tragedy for commercial tat all we want! P.S. If you don’t like it it doesn’t even matter #Loophole #FuckYou Chris joins us to discuss “Musings of a Cigarette Smoking Man” and the Millennium episode “Blood Relatives”
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Where nonsense conspiracy theories will always have hammers dropped on them.
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Listen to Episode 4×07 – 2:14:27
Tags: "Hey I'm just trying to keep up", 1962, 1963, 1991, 1992, 1996, A fouty four minute fuck you to the audience, A troubled orphan, all the facts, All The President's Men, Anita Hill, Apology Thwarting, Apparently Chris Carter was among the people that didn't have a fucking clue what was happening in this episode, Arbitrary use of black and white, assassinations, Baby Boomers, Bane, Baywatch Nights, Bill Mulder, Brad Cupples, Bruce Harwood, Buffalo Bills, Chris JC, Chris Owens, Cigarette Smoking Man, Claire Laffar, Coincidence, CSM-25 countermeasure filter, Dan Zukovic, Dana Scully, David Duchovny, David Fredericks, Dean Aylesworth, Deep Throat, Dermot Mulroney, Doctor Who, Doctor Who: The Eleventh Hour Podcast, Donnelly Rhodes, Dummy-Repeating-Exposition-Detective, Dutch, Einstein's Twin Paradox: A New Interpretation, Everybody can have plenty of blame there's no reason to serve it just to Chris Carter, Feel free to send us candy money pizza or scotch, Forrest Gump, Fort Bragg, Fox Mulder, Frank Spotnitz, Frohike should be dead, Fuck you baby-boomers, Fun Ride is the cloak of cowards, Gecko, General Francis, Gillian Anderson, Gingervitis, Glen Morgan, Greer Cort, Hacky, Henry IV part one, Hordak, How the fuck was anyone associated with this garbage nominated for anything other than unemployment?, I can kill you whenever I please... but not today, I hate hate hate hate hate hate hate hate hate hate hate hate hate hate hate hate hate this episode, Indiana George, introtox, introtox.com, J. Edgar Hoover, Jack Colquitt, James Earl Ray, James Wong, Jerry Hardin, JFK, Jimmy Olsen, Joe DiMaggio, John F. Kennedy, John Fitzgerald Byers, Just listening to this to write tags is raising my blood pressure, Last Breath, Laurie Murdoch, Laziest fucking writers room on the planet, Lee Harvey Oswald, Life is like a box of chocolates, Lone Gunman, Lydon, magazine, Martin Luther King Jr., Melvin Frohike, Millennium, Miracle on Ice Hockey Match, Morgan Weisser, Movies, Mr. Hunt, Mul-dor bland minion of Skeletor, Mulder was a smug douche as a baby, Musings of a Cigarette-Smoking Man, My advice? Burn it! It stunk, Nicotine Patch, Oliver Stone is a crank, Paul Jarrett, Peter Hanlon, Quantum Leap, Rang Dang Do, Raul Bloodworth, Red Dwarf, Red Skull, Resignation letter, Robin Burdge, Rodney King Trial, Roman a Clef, Ronald, Smoking Man, So there were no aliens between Roswell and 1991 now? Is Samantha still part of the mythology or should we ignore that like every other piece of 'mythology' that gets obliterated on a weekly basis?, Soap, Space: Above and Beyond, Spooky, Super Bowl, Swashbuckling George, Take a Chance: A Jack Colquitt Adventure, Tammy Ginader, Teliko, Terry O'Quinn's Mustache, The Comedian, The Commedian, The Lone Gunmen, The Magic Bullet, The Mark Snow - Murray Gold - Hanz Zimmer of our Generation, The New Mustache Man, This episode is completely disposable, Tom Braidwood, Trust no one, UFO wreck, ugh Frohike not being killed off is the cherry on the top of this shit sundae, UN resolution 1013, Wasted Opportunity, We devise at least two dozen better versions of this ep, We're not exactly sure of what happened on Millennium but it was still better than X-Files, What is the new Interpretation Scully? WHAT IS IT?, What the fuck happened between George arriving and leaving to make him not kill Frohike?, Where the fuck are the elders? Or anyone, Where the hell is Darin Morgan, Who the fuck put an alien on a ventilator?, Why do they have a sign?, Why does the alien have a ventilator?, William B. Davis, Winnie The Pooh, Winter Soldier, X-Files, xfiles, You're Skeptical of Victim's Services? Really?, Young William Mulder
Episode 3×08 – Oubliette
December 10th, 2013
Will helps us navigate “Oubliette” a super creepy episode made creepier by Mulder’s constant attempts to bang the adult analog for his sister. Scully is over these whiny sadsack kidnap victims and Tammy is hulking out with rage at Spooky Acting Chops Mulder.
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Where we don’t know how you feel.
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Listen to Episode 3×08 – 1:37:21
Tags: Acting Chops, Agent Kreski, America's Sweetheart Angie Harmon, Amy Jacobs, Boner Check, Bonnie Hay, Brad Cupples, By most yardsticks Scully is a psycho cunt in this ep, C.O.P.S. The animated series, Carl Wade, Charles Grant Craig, Charles Grant Craig Richard Henry Robert John Paul George Ringo, Chimos, Chris Carter, Chris Hansen, Claire Laffar, Creepiest Creepo Ever, Dana Scully, Darkwing Duck, Darkwing Duck is not a rapist, David Duchovny, David Fredericks, David Lewis, Dean Wray, Debriefing 101, Dolly Scarr, Down the rabbit hole, Empathic Transference, Fast Food Supervisor, Fighting Crime in a Future Time, Firefly, Fox Mulder, Gillian Anderson, Henry, Hey Mulder stop trying to bang the emotionally distraught woman, HouseMulder, How as this fool never been caught, introtox, introtox.com, Jacques Lalonde, Jewel Staite, Just because Scully is a professional kidnap victim doesn't mean you get to be a bitch, Ken Ryan, Kim Manners, LabyrithCast, Larsen, Little House on the Praire nightgown, Lucy Householder, Michael Chieffo, Myra Jacobs, Nobody's gonna spoil us, One follows. One Exists: The X-Files, Oubliette, Paramedic, Predators, Professional FBI Kidnap Victim, Professional Hair Flipper, Robert Underwood, Robin Burdge, Saved by the Bell: Wedding in Vegas, Sidonie Boll, Spooky Mulder, STOP TOUCHING HER MOUTH, Tammy Ginader, That's a no-no, The Tow Truck Driver, Tracey Ellis, Walt Eubanks, We all know how Tammy feels, Who is a fan of confined spaces?, X-Files, xfiles, You don't get to randomly shoot unarmed people