We are here to tell you everything you might need to know about the first 7.25 seasons of The X-Files before it’s inexplicable return. From Conquistador Tree-People to Clone Drone Hybrids this is truly the definite Critical Guide to Characters, Mythology, and Monsters whether you Want To Believe it or not.

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Where Mustache Man is canon.

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Listen to Special Episode – 0:52:06

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It’s time for the season six finale as we discuss the theoretically exciting monologue laden kludge 6×22 “Biogenesis” in which magic alien space rocks attack bibles to convey information and Mulder gets fucked crazy. Millennium 3×19 “Seven and One” shows us Frank’s fear of drowning and a lot really random nonsense penned by Chris Carter.

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Where Neptune is always there with a refreshing Coca-Cola brand soda!

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Listen to Episode 6×22 – 1:33:21

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Gabby and Jonathon join us as we gather to pay our respects to an American Hero, Champion of the Taxpayer, and National Treasure: Jeffrey Spender and discuss 6×12 “One Son”. The mythology continues to make no sense at all and Mulder kills another citizen for no reason. On Millennium 3×09 “Omerta” it’s time for a kooky Christmas with Wood Nymphs.

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Where we are all in mourning.

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Listen to Episode 6×12 – 2:17:51

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Episode 5×07 – Emily

November 6th, 2014

Evangeline is here to help us bury Scully’s dead monster-garbage-baby in 5×07 “Emily”. It somehow goes out of it’s way to be mad boring and brings an unmissed David Duchovny back into the show. Millennium 2×07 “19:19”
is a creepy delight with crazy kid snatching Jeezos and Kristen Cloke.

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Where the snozzberries taste like snozzberries.

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Listen to Episode 5×07 – 2:11:26

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Ian joins us for 4×14 “Memento Mori”. Scully decides to fight her cancer by moving into a hospital. Scully then decides to fight her cancer by moving out of the hospital. Also: Hybrid clones, conspiracies, Lone Gunmen, and horrific Chris Carter Monologues. In Millennium 1×13 “Force Majeure” we seemingly get a mythology episode that makes no sense at all but is still incredibly delightful thanks to the antics of the Millennium Group’s wacky tag-along neighbor played by Brad Dourif.

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Where we will never steal your voice in exchange for cancer treatment.

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Listen to Episode 4×14 – 2:59:42

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