Michael David and Pat join us for 9×19 “The Truth’ as we close out the original run of this show the only way Chris Carter could, with a boring clip show that pretends to put the pieces together but fails to do a damn thing. We learn that Mulder has been bunking with everyone’s favorite chess champ from the Philippines whilst Spender was saving the entire goddamn world.

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Where we can’t believe this was on for 9 years.

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Listen to Episode 9×19 – 2:32:32

Tags: 2012, Acting Chops, Adam Baldwin, Alan Dale, Alex Krycek, Alvin Kersh, Annabeth Gish, bell 206 jet ranger helicopter, Black Oil, Brad Cupples, Bruce Harwood, Chris Owens, Christopher Stapleton, Claire Laffar, Clip Show, Clones, Cody Lightning, Cupcakes, Daisy Kersh, Dana Scully, David Duchovny, Dean Haglund, Deep Throat, Doomsday, Drones, Drunk Reyes, Fox Mulder, Gibson Praise, Gillian Anderson, Hybrids, Indian Boy, introtox, introtox.com, James Pickens Jr., Jeff Gulka, Jeffrey Spender, John Doggett, John Fitzgerald Byers, Julia Vera, Knowle Rohrer, Lana Chee, Laurie Holden, magnetite, Marita Covarrubias, Matthew Glave, Melvin Frohike, Michael David, Mitch Pileggi, Monica Reyes, Mr. X, Nicholas Lea, Pat Nadeau, Pennywise, Philippine Chess Champion, Questionable Legal Tactics, Richard Langly, Robert Patrick, Rosswell, Series Finale, Smoking Man, So no follow-up questions? none at all? ok... cool i guess?, Special Agent Kallenbrunner, Spiders Eyes, Steven Williams, Super Soldiers, Tammy Ginader, Teliko, The truth, This doesn't make sense, This is nonsense, This is nothing a little salad can’t fix, Tom Braidwood, Toothpick Man, Walter Skinner, William, William B. Davis, X-Files, xfiles

DJ J-Jon Jonathon and Chris are here to discuss the beautiful tapestry that is 9×16 “William’ Wherein Scully is the worst mom ever with the most questionable logic ever. Despite the unending supply of bullshit that is thrown at him American Hero Jeffrey Spender saves the world yet again. William moves to Brimleytown.

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Where we are taking donations to buy Spender a Lone Gunmen mask.

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Listen to Episode 9×16 – 1:52:35

Tags: Adam Nelson, Annabeth Gish, Baby William, Brad Cupples, Burning sheets, Chris JC, Chris Owens, Claire Laffar, Cupcakes, Cyd Strittmatter, Dana Scully, Daniel Miller, David Duchovny, DNA, Dr. Edwards, Gillian Anderson, Harsh Realm, House of D, How would he be shorter, introtox, introtox.com, It's a bad day for Doggett, James Riker, Jay Leno Fashions, Jeffrey Spender, John Doggett, Jonathon Pope, Kersh, Ma and Pa Kent, Mitch Pileggi, Monica Reyes, Mr. Van De Kamp, Mrs. Van De Kamp, Robert Patrick, Scully is the worst mother, Shannon Hile, Stranger Danger, Super Soldiers, Tammy Ginader, The Breather, Travis Riker, Walter Skinner, William, X-Files, xfiles

Gabby and Jonathon join us as we gather to pay our respects to an American Hero, Champion of the Taxpayer, and National Treasure: Jeffrey Spender and discuss 6×12 “One Son”. The mythology continues to make no sense at all and Mulder kills another citizen for no reason. On Millennium 3×09 “Omerta” it’s time for a kooky Christmas with Wood Nymphs.

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Where we are all in mourning.

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Listen to Episode 6×12 – 2:17:51

Tags: "Agent Scully. Make some sense." "What the hell does that mean?" No Mulder. They did not burn themselves, 25 years, A lone cupcake without an owner, Agent Diana Fowley, Al Ruscio, Al Ryan, Alex Krycek, Alien Fetus, All the teeth, Alvin Donald Kersh, American Hero: Jeffrey Spender, ANSWER THE QUESTION, At The Hour Of Our Death, Bees that pollinate corn, Bill Mulder, BitchJerk, Black Oil, Bob Morrisey, Boney Nerone, boring awful monologues, brawatch, Brittany Tiplady, Bruce Harwood, Buffy the Vampire Slayer, Candy-Apple, Cassandra Spender, Cassandra Spender is the worst mother EVER, CGB Spender, Chester George Barnabus Spender, Chris Carter half-assing it, Chris Owens, Cigarette Smoking Man, clone, Cobrakai, Cobrakai might be a spooky ghost, Colonization, Consequences!, Contagion, Daisy Kersh, Dana Scully, Dana with an 'I', David Duchovny, Dean Haglund, DID THEY BURN THE SHORT SKIRT?!?! NOOOOOOO!, DJ Jonny Jon Jon J-Pontif, Don S. Williams, Drawers in drawers, Eddie Scarpino Giannini, El Rico Air Force Base, Evangeline and Jonathon are the Gary Busey of our tags, Faceless Rebels, Faeries, Fifth Elder, First Elder, Fort Marlene, Fourth Elder, Fox Mulder, Foxy Disco Scientist 4Ever, Frank Black, Frank Ertl, FUCK YOU GEORGE, Gillian Anderson, How did Cassandra get to the base? Where did that truck come from?, How do they get their jobs back?, Hybrid, I can't believe how terrible this plan is, If they get their jobs back it's only because Kersh granted Spender's dying wish, James DiStefano, James Pickens, Jar Baby, Jeffrey Spender, John Fitzgerald Byers, Jon Polito, Jon vs Train, Jonathan Polgreen, Jonathon Pope, Jordan Black, Jr., Keegan Tracy, Kill yourself bitch, Klea Scott, Krycek, Lamp grabbing, Lance Henriksen, Laurie Holden, Lhasa, Lil' Candy Apple, Liquid Nitrogen, Little Foot, Little Girls in Masks, Loyalties to the X-Files, Marita Covarrubias, Mass Panic? Really?, Massive Head Trauma, Melvin Frohike, Michelle Beauchamp, Millennium, Mimi Rogers, Mitch Pileggi, Mobs, Mulder is 99% Cardboard, Mulder is a creep!, New York City, Nicholas Lea, Not passing. At. All., Omerta, One alien fetus = the lives of 30 human women. Thus the aliens have roughly the same stance on choice as the Republican Party, One Son, Peter Donat, PotentialCast, Previously on, Purity, Purity Control, R. Nelson Brown, Ralph, Ralph's family is forever destroyed, Remember when Mulder and Krycek were infected with the black oil, Richard Langly, RIP Spender, Rose, Rose has saw hand powers, Sexy Shower Time, She's The One, Sheriff Earl Parker, So what happened to the black oil turning into giant scary monsters?, Special Agent Emma Hollis, Spender needs to put a bell on his momz, Stick around til the end to hear tales of upsetting head wounds!, Suicide is painless. It brings on many changes. And I can take or leave it if it would thwart an INVASION OF GODDAMN ALIENS, Superman 3, Swishy Hipped Waggily Hand Aliens, Teliko, The Lone Gunmen, The Pretender, The Syndicate, THE WRONG SON DIED, There are so many ways to die in a hospital, These guys have spent more time in quarantine than any humans in history, This doesn't make sense at all, This is a shitty deal, Tom Braidwood, Tom McBeath, Tunisia, Veronica Cartwright, Walter Skinner, We might be podcasting with a g-g-g-ghost this week, What happened to Gibson and that alien?, What happens in the tree stays in the tree, What has been stopping the colonization up until now?, What is Frank wearing?, What was he doing in her apartment ALL night? Whitewater rafting Claire, Where did he even find that photo?, Why / When is that photo on fire?, Why did Mulder kill the conductor?, Why is Hollis here?, Why the fuck is George giving the Aliens a goddamn flag?, Wigs, William B. Davis, William Mulder, Wood nymphs, You can find Jonathon right here... in these very tags!

Alirio and Heidi join us for 6×11 “Two Fathers”. It’s the mythology episode Claire has been begging for! Thrill at the minutes of valuable screen time devoted to an unnecessary exposition monologue! Marvel at the most racially uncomfortable writing sense the last time Chris Carter dared to have a black person in one of his scripts! Rage at the injustices heaped upon Jeff Spender: Champion of the Taxpayer! Agonize over the puzzle of why this episode is called “Two Fathers”. In Millennium 3×08 “Human Essence” Hollis has to clear her name and rescue her illegitimate junkie half-sister from a terrible plot.
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Where words have meanings.

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Listen to Episode 6×11 – 1:56:59

Tags: "I'm ready to J-O-B just not on some jagoff shoeshine tip", "Yo Homestyle cough up the rock", A case of the yips, Agent Diana Fowley, Agent Emma Hollis, Al Ruscio, Alex Krycek, Aliens, Alirio Ferreira, Angie WATCH YOUR BACK. #RougeCop #SeeSomethingSaySomething, Arson, Assistant Director Andy McClaren, Assistant Director Walter Skinner, Bad Girls, Basketball, Basketball Player, Basketball Sweaters, Brad Cupples, Buffy the Vampire Slayer, Bullfrog Andy is like a less interesting Boss Hogg, Canada, Candy-Apple, Candygram, Cassandra is the worst, Cassandra Spender, CastleCast, Check n' Spender, Chester George Barnabus Spender, China, Chris Carter, Chris Carter Monologues, Chris Owens, Cigarette Smoking Man, Claire Laffar, Conspiracy, Damon P. Saleem, David Duchovny, Department of Justice, Don S. Williams, Don't taste white powder found in envelopes, Dr. Eugene Openshaw, Et tu Stingray?, Exposition George, FBI Agent, Fifth Elder, Fight The Future, Fight. Fight. Fight the Future, First Elder, Flukie - Gold Medal Olympian, Fourth Elder, Frank Black Klea Scott, Frank Ertl, Frank Spotnitz, Frank turns into a dragon to escape an exploding building, George Murdock, Gillian Anderson, Greg Evigan, Heidi Jenkins, Heroin, Hey Hollis? why are you cloaking out?, Hey transcript writers... are you OK?, Hollis is the worst, How did you get your clothes?, How is Diana still awake?, Human Essence, Humanzees, I'm pretty sure Chris Carter's version of "The Godfather" is closer to Corky Romano, In what way do they look like monsters?, introtox, introtox.com, Jeff Spender: American Hero and Champion of the Taxpayer, Jeffrey Spender, Kersh, Kill Switch, Kim Manners, Lance Henriksen, LEAVE SPENDER ALONE, Milk, Millennium, Mimi Rogers, Mitch Pileggi, Monsters, Mr. Ho, Mulder and Scully might have gotten fired... AGAIN, Mulder is NOT a special snowflake, My Two Dads, Mythology, Nicholas Lea, Nick Tate, Nopenheimer, Nopenshaw, Paul Reiser, Paul Reiser and the other guy, Peter Outerbridge, Pizza Guy, Pool, PotentialCast, Powerpoint, Previously on, Racism, Relax your jaw and your pelvis, Samaria Graham, Scully's Short Skirt, Second Elder, Sexy Lego Robot Guard, So... you don't have evidence then..., Soooo apparently Krycek and Spender are immune to the extremely toxic alien blood, Special Agent Barry Baldwin Stephen E. Miller, Spender > Luke Skywalker, Stephen Chang, Stop being a dick to Spender, Stop smoking IN THE HOSPITAL, Take him to his damn mother already, Tammy Ginader, Tamra Caffrey, That is not what hybrid means, The cliffhanger of this episode rests on if you think Mulder might murder an innocent defenseless old woman, The Iron Sheik, The Pretender, The Proffessor SAT DOWN!, The Truth Out There, The X-Files, They had cleaned up the mythology and then they jump full force into all the awful garbage mythology, This doesn't make sense at all, This episode is brought you by hotmail: for when you don't really need your mail, Those faces rip off very easily, Trust no one, Two Fathers, Valerie Pettiford, Veronica Cartwright, Who are the two fathers?, Why aren't we working with the Rebels?, Why is everybody treating Spender like crap?, Why is Mulder hiding?, Why would shapeshifters need to mutilate their orifices, William B. Davis, X-Files, xfiles, You should not use the same nickname for your girlfriend as your sister. That is weird.

Bruce Campbell is a sadsack demon looking to start a family. Mulder steals garbage to insert himself into a situation that leads to an elderly woman’s life being completely ruined. On Millennium 3×04 “Closure” Hollis tries to shut down a Grand Theft Auto situation by teaching a valuable lesson about seat-belt safety.
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Where we click it or ticket.

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Listen to Episode 6×07 – 1:26:10

Tags: Agent Emma Hollis, Anti-Choice Wackiness, Background Checks, Beer Bad, Betsy Monroe, Biography Channel, Brad Cupples, Breath Snatching, Bruce Campbell, Bud Hasselhoff, Chris Carter only knows three women, Chris Owens, Claire Laffar, Claire's Internet connection is as reliable as her hotmail, classic case of demon fetus harvest, Click it or Ticket or Die, Czechoslovakia, Dana Scully, David Duchovny, demon, Demons, Deputy Arky Stevens, Devils, Diy Network, Don't drink glowing milk, Don't fuck around with demons, Donald and Jeff: Friends. Buddies. Investigators, File Shredder, Fox Mulder, Fox Mulder with garbage snatching action, Frank Black, Garbage, Garret Dillahunt, Gillian Anderson, Glamour Pregnant, Gordy Boitano, Grace Phillips, Grand Theft Auto: Millenium Edition, Hollins, How is "The Simpson's" not the longest running cartoon? I am calling Shenanigans on Wikipedia, How old is this woman married to Bruce Campbell, I thought devils and demons and gods were the random subset of things that Scully did believe in and Mulder did not, If Frank Black sees a demon he keeps it to himself, If Mulder and Scully stayed out of this it would have been better for everyone involved, If you need a translation of Machiavelli's "The Mandrake" go with the one by Wallace Shawn, In the X-Files universe people are always coming door to door to take blood, introtox, introtox.com, Ivan Veles, Jeffrey Spender, Jimmy Staszkiel, Joni, Klea Scott, Klingon Baby, Lance Henriksen, Laura Weinsider, Lisa Jane Persky, Log Lady, Mandrake, Maybe consider adopting?, Michael Milhoan, Michael Sunczyk, Millennium, Mr. Ginsberg, Mulder goes undercover as a janitor, Peter, Rick Van Horn, Roanoke, Rosemary's Baby, Saying poopydoo is illegal and punishable by facing a warcrimes tribunal, Shelley Owens, Sonogram, Tammy Ginader, Terms of Endearment, The importance of seatbelts, The stakes have never been milder, The straight man to a dragon, This old lady is having the worst week imaginable, Vele, Virginia, Wallace Shawn, Wayne Weinsider, When you have a Job Jar it's time to invest in a noose, Where did all these demon babies come from? HOW MANY FAMILIES DID HE HAVE IN THIS COUNTY?, Why do you want to wear your bloody baby snatching nightgown?, Why is it anyone's priority to prosecute this woman?, WHY IS THIS WOMAN BEING PUNISHED?, X-Files, xfiles

Dan joins us for 6×03 “Triangle” Not a Hoax! Not a dream! Not an imaginary story! Scully is a super badass and we finally get Scully/Stingray kiss we’ve all been waiting for.Meanwhile Mulder chases a ghost ship into the Bermuda Triangle, inexplicably crashes his boat, passes out in the ocean, and has a wacky 1939 dream. The season finale of Millennium 2×23 “The Time is Now” is truly bonkers and devotes a fourth of the episode to a wacky Kristen Cloke Music Video.

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Where you can chat about Scully/Stingray 24/7.

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Listen to Episode 6×03 – 1:45:12

Tags: "I'm going to kick your butt but good", #TeamKersh, 100K Swath Imaging, 1939, 64 West by Southwest, A fun ride, Acting Chops, Albert Einstein, Alvin Kersh, American Hero: Jeffrey Spender, Apparently sometimes 'No' means 'sure why not', Arlene Pileggi, Assistant Director Alvin Kersh, AWACS, Bermuda Triangle, Birdman, Brad Cupples, Brian De Palma, Brittany Tiplady, Bruce Harwood, Calm the fuck down Mark Frost, Captain Yip Harburg, Catherine Black, Catherine can't die, ChaosAtom.com, Chris Carter, Chris Carter Trying Hard, Chris Owens, Cigarette Smoking Man, Claire is one of those campaigners, Claire Laffar, Claire talks shit about her friends, Dan Ginader, Dana Scully, David Duchovny, Dean Haglund, Devil's Triangle, Dialect Coach Monsters, Don't threaten your co-workers, Facedown Floating Fox, Fox Mulder, Frank Black, Fun Facts, Game Changer, Gillian Anderson, Heil Teenser Hitler, Hello OLD MAN, Hey you guys need to drive this boat back into the Bermuda Triangle... oh me? I'm outskie! Bye, Hotness, How are we so right and the fans of the show SO wrong?, HOW DID NO ONE INFORM US THAT SKINNER'S SECRETARY IS PLAYED BY HIS WIFE?, I want to go that way, I watched the Prisoner episode "Living in Harmony" on the same day I watched this. It was a really weird day of bizarre fanfic alternate universe episodes, I'll Theoretically Eventually Watch That With Tammy and Dan in 2014 and release it someday, I'll Watch That Movie w/ Tammy and Dan, I'm really worried about the third season of Millennium now, introtox, introtox.com, J. Edgar Hoover FBI Building, Jamaican Crewman, James Pickens Jr., Jeepers Creepers, Jeffrey Spender, John Brown, John Fitzgerald Byers, Jordan Black, Kersh, Kristen Cloke, Kristen Cloke... are you ok?, Krycek should have been in this ep, Lady Garland, Lance Henriksen, Lara Means, Literal Hitler, Lover's Walk, Madison Mason, Marburg Virus, Megan Gallagher, Melvin Frohike, Millennium, Mitch Pileggi, Morley, Mulder is a dummy, Navy, Nazis, Now is not the time for song and dance, Oldschool, Peter Watts, Puddintame, Punch that fool again, Punched Back to The Future, Queen Anne, Richard Langly, San Pedro, Sargasso Sea Maybe say 'please' and 'thank you' instead of 'do it or I will kill you', Scully and Skinner 4Ever, Scully is a badass, Season 6: Scully gets a desk, Sexual Harassment, shop.chaosatom.com, Skinner's Assistant, SLAR, So many questionable accents, Spender, Stingray, Swing Kids, Tammy Ginader, Team Kersh, Teenser Hitler, Terry O'Quinn, The coffee guy, The Field Where I Died, The first correct use of an exclamation mark ever, The Imposters, The kiss that changed everything, The Lollipop Guild, The Lone Gunmen, The new old man, The Time is now, The Wizard of Oz, These guys are super casual for a boat captured by Nazis, These Scully/Mulder Shippers are completely fucking insane, This 4 minute music video is insane, Those flowers weren't for Mulder, Three high-rated episodes in a row? Can the streak last... (spoiler alert: No. definitely not.) LEAVE SPENDER ALONE, Thwarted, Time Travel, Tom Braidwood, Tracking Shots, Triangle, Visuals are meaningless to me, Walter Skinner, What are you people talking about? The Lone Gunmen are barely in this episode, Where did Lara get a vial of the vaccine, Where the fuck was CobraKai, White Haired Frank, William B. Davis, Wizard of Oz, X-Files, xfiles

It’s time for a new season and 6×01 “The Beginning” in which somehow they have finally decided to have some actual continuity on the show. The world champion chess master of the Philippines is back and he’s hunting down hiders in the reactor. We also meet our new favorite character Asst. Dir. Kersh. Millennium 2×21 “Somehow, Satan Got Behind Me”is everything we could have hoped for.

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Where no one tries to re-hydrate burnt paper.

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Listen to Episode 6×01 – 1:37:25

Tags: #TeamSpender, 90's Child Empowerment Bullshit, A battle of will between Duchovny and Carter: Who's side will you be on?, Abum, Alex Diakun, Alien, Alien Tracking Psychic Kids, Ally McBeal, Alvin Kersh, An awful Simpsons joke, Apparently you can't opperate a desk without a penis, Assistant Director Maslin, Band Candy, Baywatch, BEES DON'T POLLINATE CORN, Bill Macy, Blurk, Brad Cupples, Buffy the Vampire Slayer, Butchers, Candy-Apple, CarpoolMan, Chariots of the Gods, Chris Owens, Claire Laffar, Commentary, CONTINUITY, Crazed Filthy Red Savage, Crazy Indian on the loose, Damnation via papercut, Dan Zukovic, Dancing Devil Baby, Darin Morgan, Darin Morgan's BFF, David Duchovny, Deadlights, Devils, Diana Fowley, Dick Bakalyan, Dipwad, Don S. Williams, Don't poke things in the dark, Don't touch shit on the floor, Donut Shop, Evidence, Fight The Future, First Elder, Frank Black, Frankenstein, Freddy Kruger, Fucking Diana, G. Arnold, Gabrielle Rose, George, George Murdock, Gibson Praise, Gillian Anderson, Glory Day for Jon, Greb, Hi, Hider in the house, Hider in the Reactor, Homer, Hot Dog, Independence Day, Intelligent Black Oil --> Chest Burster Monster --> Giant Feral Monster --> Intelligent Deal Making Grey, introtox, introtox.com, James Pickens Jr., Jeff Gulka, Jeffrey Spender, Kersh is the greatest new character ever, Kersh's Wife, Lance Henriksen, Learn to cloak out your shit Mulder, Lets just build new walls on top of these old walls, Millennium, Mimi Rogers, Mitch Pileggi, Mulder gets his comeuppance, Mulder has absolutely seen Men in Black, Mulder is a dick, Nonchalant Demon sitting in a truck, North, please don't flick ash into this kid's exposed brain, Quantum Leap, Rehydrating ashes, RuPaul, Sally, Sandman, Second Elder, Slacker Guests, Sneak Attack Diana, Somehow Satan Got Behind Me, Someone To Trust, Standards and Practices, Stingray, Stop making Spender the bad guy, T.C., Tammy Ginader, Taxpayer dollars at work, Teliko, The Beginning, The Frankenstein of the Philippines, The law of fun facts, The Movie, The Pretender, The Red Man?, The Smoking Man, There's no 'I" in Team... but there is one in "Diana", This is a hugely unlikely life cycle, This kid is still not the key to all the X-Files, Toby, Wacky Lacky, Wally Dalton, Walter Skinner, Waylon Figgleif, Wayne Alexander, Wendie Malick, Where are Gibson's parents, William B. Davis, X-Files, xfiles, You cannot reconstitute burnt paper, You think the POWER PLANT would be the one place where they don't worry about the cost of lighting their facility considering they PRODUCE THE POWER

Dan and Mike join us for the season five finale 5×20 “The End” in which a chess-playing telepath from the Philippines is revealed to be the key to ALL of the X-Files. How is this possible? No Clue. I’m SURE we’ll find out in the movie. Check n’ Spender are back in the mix and being completely wasted. Millennium 2×20 “A Room With No View” is horrifically terrifying and amazing.

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Where we know Check n’ Spender deserve better.

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Listen to Episode 5×20 – 1:41:51

Tags: A Room With No View, Acting Chops, Alex Krycek, Alien Astronauts, Anne, Assassin, Assistant Director Walter Skinner, Awkward Hug, Back and to the left, Baywatch, Baywatch Nights, Ben, Black-Haired Man, Bletch, Bloodlines, Boyhood, Brad Cupples, Bruce Harwood, Bumblecek, Candy Apple got brand new chompers, Catherine Black, Chad Todhunter, ChaosAtom.com, Check n' Spender, Chess, Chess Handlers, Chris Carter is the devil, Chris Kyle was a goddamn bloodthirsty savage murderer and a racist. The world is better with him no longer in it, Chris Owens, Christopher Kennedy Masterson, Cigarette Smoking Man, Claire Laffar, Dan Ginader, Dana Scully, David Duchovny, Dean Haglund, Detective Bob Giebelhouse, Detective Sandwich, Diana Fowley, Don S. Williams, Don't rub a cigarette wrapper in someone's face you're a fucking adult, Driving Miss Well-Manicured Man, Evil Robin, First Elder, Fox Mulder, Frank Black, Frank Black with devil fighting sunglasses, Fuck American Sniper, Fuck State Sponsored Murderers, Gary Busey, George Murdock, Gibson Praise, Gillian Anderson, Hey kid maybe give a little bit of a heads up before somebody is murdered, Hider in the house, How does killing a telepathic chess champ benefit these guys?, I guess Mulder is going to have to go to the flea market and buy another poster, If other chumps wanted to be on the movie ep they should have sent in Fanfic, introtox, introtox.com, It's YOUR days that are numbered!, jealous Scully is the worst, Jeff Gulka, Jeffrey Spender, Jingle all the way 2, John Fitzgerald Byers, John Neville, Jurassic Park, Lance Henriksen, Landon Bryce, Liar Liar PANTS ON FIRE!, Love is Blue, Lucifer, Lucy Butler, Mariangelo Pina, Martin Ferrero, Megan Gallagher, Melvin Frohike, Michael David, Michael Shamus Wiles, Millennium, Mimi Rogers, Mitch Pileggi, Morley, Mr. Bryce, Nicholas Lea, Oscars, Pendrell, Peter Pan, Peter Watts, Pressors and Pressure, Professor X, Richard Langly, Rob Zombie, Sarah-Jane Redmond, Scientology, Season Finale, Second Elder, shop.chaosatom.com, Silence of the Lambs, Silver Surfer, Skycek, Skyrim Addict Podcast, Stephen James Lang, Stingray, Tammy Ginader, Teliko, Teresa, Terrible FBI agent... Worse Babysitter, Terry O'Quinn, The Chatter Box Podcast, The Dells, The Devil, The End, The kid went Elvis, The Lone Gunmen, The Pretender, The stakes have never been lower, They already know there's an evil syndicate WHAT DO THEY GAIN FROM MAKING A DEAL?, They have never been more tangentially parallel to the truth, This is a terribly designed test of psychic ability, This is the first time Claire has done more editing than Brad would have. TRUST, This kid can hear thoughts AND words... so maybe stop talking shit in front of him, This kid is not from the Philippines, Timothy Webber, Tom Braidwood, Well-Manicured Man, What are these long term plans?, What does this kid prove that a captured Teliko; Toombs; or Flukey doesn't?, Where are this kid's parents, WHERE THE FUCK DID GEORGE DISAPEAR TO?, Whiplash, White Zombie, Why are so many people watching this chess tournament?, Why are you striking a deal with this assassin?, Why does Chris Carter go out of his way to make Scully the worst?, William B. Davis, Worst comeback ever, X-Files, X-Files is being shut down... AGAIN, xfiles, You have to feed prisoners, You're Dead!

A second part of a two-parter that doesn’t completely fall apart? Evangeline joins us for 5×14 “The Red and the Black” There’s a vague ill-defined war going on between alien factions. Scully acts like a real Mulder-dummy and has regression hypnosis before having sense talked into her by Jeffrey Spender, American Hero and future half of the hottest new buddy cop show. Frank uses his Dragon powers to catch sin eater/urban legend dream catcher in Millennium 2×14 “The Pest House”

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Where Jeffrey Spender gets the respect he deserves.

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Listen to Episode 5×14 – 1:58:54

Tags: "I remind myself of a Navajo Story" --The most Chris Carter thing I've ever heard, "Look my Momz is just a dummy cripple. How's she supposed to roll her crippled up wheelchair all the way to Mt Crazy?", "Quiet Willy", Alex Krycek, Alex Shostak Jr, Alien Colonists, Allen Coulter, Black Oil, Brad Cupples, Brian Thompson, Bulletproof, Canada, Cassandra Spender, Catherine Black, Chapelle Jaffe, Check n' Spender, Chris Carter, Chris Owens, Cigarette Smoking Man, Claire Laffar, Dana Scully, Darcy Laurie, David Duchovny, Dmitri, Does Scully spend more time being kidnapped or in a hospital bed, Don S. Williams, Dr. Heitz Werber, Dr. Paton, Dr. Stoller, E. Jacob Woodcock, Edward, Evangeline, First Elder, Fox Mulder, Frank Black, George Murdock, Gillian Anderson, Glen Morgan, Go Fish, How many terrible novels were written in the smoking man cabin, Hypnosis, Hypnotic Orgasms, I gotta sell more paps, implants, introtox, introtox.com, James Wong, Jeffrey Spender, Jim Jansen, John Moore, John Neville, Justin Louis, Kermit the Frog had a much harder time breaking out of a Gulag than Mulder did after he was infected with Alien Black Oil Parasites, Lance Henriksen, Laurie Holden, Marita Cobrakai, Marita Covarrubias, Maybe send your childhood pals a bottle of Scotch or a cheese plate instead of naming boats and dead bodies after them, Megan Gallagher, Melinda McGraw, Melissa Scully, Michael Massee, Miehal Suchanek, Millennium, Mitch Pileggi, MulCek, Mulder is such a dick, Mulder jumped on the back of a truck whilst throwing Scully under a bus, Nicholas Lea, Peter Watts, Prosthetic Arm Mini-Fridge, Purdue, Regression Hypnotherapy is not a thing, Relax your jaw and your pelvis and let's go to the night place... What? RED ALERT! RED ALERT!, Resist or Serve, Russian freighter, Scully Loses, Second Elder, Sin Eater, Some Vampire sends Mulder a mysterious red envelope and he's not gonna be all over it? C'mon Tammy that is ridic, Stop laughing at your friend in the hospital you fucking weirdo, Tammy Ginader, Team Spender, Terry O'Quinn, The Big "S" Trio: Spender. Scully. Stingray., The Bounty Hunter, The Pretender, The Red and the Black, The resistance, The Syndicate, The truth is in you, The Well-Manicured Man, Third Elder, This is how all of Claire's Fan Fictions start, Veronica Cartwright, Walter Skinner, Well-Manicured Man, Whammy Awards, WHY IS HE ADJUSTING HER BED?!?!, Wiekamp Air Force Base, William B. Davis, Willy Ross, Winter Solstice Champions, X-Files, xfiles, Young Jeffrey Spender

DJ Jon Johnny Jon and Matt A join us for 5×13 “Patient X” in which Krycek and Cobrakai get super steamy on a ship. We are all shocked to realize Mulder still doesn’t believe in aliens (just vampires) and Cigarette Smoking Man is still dead. In the super creepy Millennium 2×13 “The Mikado” we go back to a time to when there were only 473 porn sites on the web.

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Where we are the only people that remember that Mulder was infected with the Black Oil.

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Listen to Episode 5×13 – 1:49:49

Tags: "Quiet Willy", 39 hours of porn, A "Great" Russian Acting Community, Alex Krycek, Aliens, All 473 porn sites, Allan Zinyk, Bad News: the pizza is cold Good News: we didn't masturbate without you Jimmy #Worst, Black Oil, Bounty Hunter, Brad Cupples, Brian Roedecker, Brian Thompson, Captain Bachman, Cassandra Spender, Chilly Willy, Chris Carter Monologue, Chris Owens, Cigarette Smoking Man is surprisingly still dead, Claire Laffar, Cobrakai, Colonists, Custom Video Call From Santa, Dana Scully, David Duchovny, Deadwood, Don S. Williams, Don't think about those stitched up orifices too much, Duane Barry, Fire in the Sky, First Elder, Fox Mulder, Frank Black, Frank's Dragon Powers Don't Work Online, Gillian Anderson, Gillian Carfra, Global Warming, Greg Michaels, Heitz Werber, HoopleCast, I Only Have Eyes For You, introtox, introtox.com, Jeffrey Spender, Jim Jansen, John Moore, John Neville, Krycek, Lance Henriksen, Laurie Holden, Marita Cobrakai, Marita Covarrubias, Massachusetts Institute Visiting Lecturers Program, Melty Face Men, Millennium, Miscalculating a pretend, Movie Contest, Mulder still doesn't believe in aliens (just vampires), Nicholas Lea, Not Mustache Man, Patient X, Peeping Teliko, Peter Watts, Robot Arm, Stay out of the forest, Tammy Ginader, Teliko, Terry O'Quinn, The Mikado, The old-fashioned-extra-steamy-steam-ship-double-cross, The Plan, The Pretender, The Web Girl, There are so many things to be afraid of, Third Elder, UFO, Unforgotten, Veronica Cartwright, Well-Manicured Man, Why are these teenage boys watching porn together, Willy Ross, Worst Skeptic Ever, X-Files, xfiles