Episode 9×19 – The Truth

September 22nd, 2016

Michael David and Pat join us for 9×19 “The Truth’ as we close out the original run of this show the only way Chris Carter could, with a boring clip show that pretends to put the pieces together but fails to do a damn thing. We learn that Mulder has been bunking with everyone’s favorite chess champ from the Philippines whilst Spender was saving the entire goddamn world.

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Where we can’t believe this was on for 9 years.

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Listen to Episode 9×19 – 2:32:32

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Episode 9×16 – William

September 1st, 2016

DJ J-Jon Jonathon and Chris are here to discuss the beautiful tapestry that is 9×16 “William’ Wherein Scully is the worst mom ever with the most questionable logic ever. Despite the unending supply of bullshit that is thrown at him American Hero Jeffrey Spender saves the world yet again. William moves to Brimleytown.

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Where we are taking donations to buy Spender a Lone Gunmen mask.

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Listen to Episode 9×16 – 1:52:35

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Gabby and Jonathon join us as we gather to pay our respects to an American Hero, Champion of the Taxpayer, and National Treasure: Jeffrey Spender and discuss 6×12 “One Son”. The mythology continues to make no sense at all and Mulder kills another citizen for no reason. On Millennium 3×09 “Omerta” it’s time for a kooky Christmas with Wood Nymphs.

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Where we are all in mourning.

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Listen to Episode 6×12 – 2:17:51

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Alirio and Heidi join us for 6×11 “Two Fathers”. It’s the mythology episode Claire has been begging for! Thrill at the minutes of valuable screen time devoted to an unnecessary exposition monologue! Marvel at the most racially uncomfortable writing sense the last time Chris Carter dared to have a black person in one of his scripts! Rage at the injustices heaped upon Jeff Spender: Champion of the Taxpayer! Agonize over the puzzle of why this episode is called “Two Fathers”. In Millennium 3×08 “Human Essence” Hollis has to clear her name and rescue her illegitimate junkie half-sister from a terrible plot.
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Where words have meanings.

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Listen to Episode 6×11 – 1:56:59

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Bruce Campbell is a sadsack demon looking to start a family. Mulder steals garbage to insert himself into a situation that leads to an elderly woman’s life being completely ruined. On Millennium 3×04 “Closure” Hollis tries to shut down a Grand Theft Auto situation by teaching a valuable lesson about seat-belt safety.
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Where we click it or ticket.

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Listen to Episode 6×07 – 1:26:10

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Episode 6×03 – Triangle

March 4th, 2015

Dan joins us for 6×03 “Triangle” Not a Hoax! Not a dream! Not an imaginary story! Scully is a super badass and we finally get Scully/Stingray kiss we’ve all been waiting for.Meanwhile Mulder chases a ghost ship into the Bermuda Triangle, inexplicably crashes his boat, passes out in the ocean, and has a wacky 1939 dream. The season finale of Millennium 2×23 “The Time is Now” is truly bonkers and devotes a fourth of the episode to a wacky Kristen Cloke Music Video.

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Where you can chat about Scully/Stingray 24/7.

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Listen to Episode 6×03 – 1:45:12

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Episode 6×01 – The Beginning

February 18th, 2015

It’s time for a new season and 6×01 “The Beginning” in which somehow they have finally decided to have some actual continuity on the show. The world champion chess master of the Philippines is back and he’s hunting down hiders in the reactor. We also meet our new favorite character Asst. Dir. Kersh. Millennium 2×21 “Somehow, Satan Got Behind Me”is everything we could have hoped for.

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Where no one tries to re-hydrate burnt paper.

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Listen to Episode 6×01 – 1:37:25

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Episode 5×20 – The End

February 4th, 2015

Dan and Mike join us for the season five finale 5×20 “The End” in which a chess-playing telepath from the Philippines is revealed to be the key to ALL of the X-Files. How is this possible? No Clue. I’m SURE we’ll find out in the movie. Check n’ Spender are back in the mix and being completely wasted. Millennium 2×20 “A Room With No View” is horrifically terrifying and amazing.

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Where we know Check n’ Spender deserve better.

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Listen to Episode 5×20 – 1:41:51

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A second part of a two-parter that doesn’t completely fall apart? Evangeline joins us for 5×14 “The Red and the Black” There’s a vague ill-defined war going on between alien factions. Scully acts like a real Mulder-dummy and has regression hypnosis before having sense talked into her by Jeffrey Spender, American Hero and future half of the hottest new buddy cop show. Frank uses his Dragon powers to catch sin eater/urban legend dream catcher in Millennium 2×14 “The Pest House”

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Where Jeffrey Spender gets the respect he deserves.

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Listen to Episode 5×14 – 1:58:54

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Episode 5×13 – Patient X

December 16th, 2014

DJ Jon Johnny Jon and Matt A join us for 5×13 “Patient X” in which Krycek and Cobrakai get super steamy on a ship. We are all shocked to realize Mulder still doesn’t believe in aliens (just vampires) and Cigarette Smoking Man is still dead. In the super creepy Millennium 2×13 “The Mikado” we go back to a time to when there were only 473 porn sites on the web.

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Where we are the only people that remember that Mulder was infected with the Black Oil.

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Listen to Episode 5×13 – 1:49:49

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