Episode 10×05 – Babylon

November 10th, 2016

Ian and Michael David join us for 10×05 – “Babylon” an episode about the fears of old white dudes before Herr Trump rode in on his great white horse to save them. Basically Mulder and Scully try to talk to a dead terrorist. It’s absolute garbage.

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Where we’re building a wall around this episode and Chris Carter is going to pay for it.

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Listen to Episode 10×5 – 1:28:22

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Amanda and Matt join us to discuss the second film “The X-Files: I Want To Believe” In which Chris Carter tries to make us sympathize with a magical child molester… seriously. The fears of a middle-aged heterosexual male baby boomer are on full display. Also apparently everybody forgot that Mulder broke out of prison where he was on death row for murder.

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Where we don’t sympathize with child molesters no matter how magical they are.

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Listen to I Want To Believe – 2:55:57

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John Doggett, Jim Rockford, Mike Pinocchio, and Elliot from E.T. join together to present the “true story” of Travis Walton’s abduction by aliens. We discuss this 1993 cinematic classic and the other bonkers claims from terribly titled book “The Walton Experience” that somehow didn’t quite make it into the film.

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Where we are all ashamed of Mrs. Pratt.

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Listen to Episode Bonus Episode: Fire in the Sky – 1:26:14

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We continue onward with Chris Carter’s last minute half-assery in Episode 9×10 – “Providence” wherein nothing reasonable happens. Teliko helps Scully find secret passages and people possibly try to surf on a spaceship. Also this prophesy makes no sense.

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Where we dont turn off hospital monitors.

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Listen to Episode 9×10 – 1:32:59

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Episode 9×07 – John Doe

June 30th, 2016

Will joins us for Episode 9×07 – “John Doe” in which Doggettt loses his memory and Reyes is drunk (as per usual). We discuss the absolute necessity for shoes at all times and learn that Reyes grew up in Mexico and theoretically speaks Spanish in a completely convincing manner.

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Where shoes are required.

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Listen to Episode 9×07 – 1:18:02

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Go to your nearest cyber-cafe and download Episode 9×06 – “Trust No 1″ in which Terry O’Quinn AKA Terrence Quinn AKA Peter/Jerry/Edgar Watts AKA Omar Santiago tries to catch Scully in an old-fashioned Sadsack-Turtleneck-Trap so that he can kill Mulder. He later explodes because of iron… or something. Also we finally figure out the deal with Reyes.

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Where we don’t let strangers sleep in the same room with our babies.

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Listen to Episode 9×06 – 1:21:47

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Prepare for another Kim Manners bug-wranglin’ classic ep of X-Files. Ian and Jon join us for Episode 9×05 – “Lord of the Flies” where we meet our hero Dr. Rocky Bronzino and learn that bug people are real creeps.

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Where bug eps are the best eps.

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Listen to Episode 9×05 – 1:42:32

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Episode 9×04 – 4D

June 9th, 2016

Chris and Will join us for Episode 9×04 – “4D” in which Doggett stumbles into the worst parallel universe ever and only through his knowledge of morse code and the actions of Follmer and questionable plotting is he able to put right what once went wrong.

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Where we always check for consent before murdering a friend.

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Listen to Episode 9×04 – 1:43:42

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Heidi joins us for episode 8×16 – “Three Words” in which Zombie Mulder is barely back from the dead and already being a dick. Thanks to Knwlle Rrgrgrorer, Little Doggett learns he’s never been closer to the truth. The Lone Gunmen 1×08 “Maximum Byers” misses all marks that it aims at and then ends with a state sponsored murder.

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Where everyone is free to admit that the mythology is inexplicable nonsense.

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Listen to Episode 8×16 – 2:02:53

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Episode 8×13 – Per Manum

March 16th, 2016

We’re back for Episode 8×13 – “Per Manum” in which someone finally remembers that Scully is pregnant. There are a grip of flashbacks to when Gillian Anderson had good hair and a lame partner. Also we meet everyone’s favorite new character Knowl Rohrrererrghragher. The Lone Gunmen 1×05 “Three Men and a Smoking Diaper” is as boring as it is sexist.

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Where no one can read a sonogram.

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Listen to Episode 8×13 – 1:30:37

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