Things are bonkers as Nazis, bumbling assassins, scurrying aliens, and everyone’s favorite sleepytime Navajo Albert get up in the mix for ‘Paper Clip’ Dave returns to try and make sense of it all as we stumble through a dark and smokey room. Will Claire be able to decide to vouchsafe for Team Skinner or Team Krycek?

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We will vouchsafe for you all.

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Listen to Episode 3×02 – 1:53:11

Tags: Acting Chops, Albert Hosteen, Alex Krycek, Alien bus stop, American Horrorcast, Any random yokel can kidnap Scully but proffesional assasins can't come anywhere near killing her, Baywatch Nights Warehouse, Bravehearts, British Columbia Museum of Mining, Bruce Harwood, Buffalo Powered Mulder, bumbling assassins, Change your clothes you repulse monster, Chris Carter, Cigarette Smoking Man, Cigarette Smoking Man has all the acting chops, Claire's colon update, Comic Sans, convenient flashligh drops, Creepiest Mother/Son conversation outside of American Horror Story, Dana Scully, DAT tape, David Duchovny, Dean Haglund, Don S. Williams, Don't fuck a buffalo, DVM Podcast Empire, Elder #1, Filing Cabinet-a-palooza, Flippy Floppy Hair-cek, Floyd 'Red Crow' Westerman, Fox IS Samantha, Fox Mulder, Frohike is the worst, Gillian Anderson, Glass ceiling, Going Rouge-cek, Goodbye Crystal Choker!, Greaser-cek, Hipocrite with a choker, If they actually have this kind of information against the gov't things are gonna start looking pretty damn good on the Rez, If you can't print or copy from A TAPE... you are doing technology wrong, It takes 3 bitches to take down an Assistant Director, Jeff Goldblum is Claire's BFF, John Fitzgerald Byers, John Neville, Manilow, Manimoo, Margaret Scully, Mel needs more secure filing cabinets, Melinda McGraw, Melissa Scully, Melvin Frohike, Mitch Pileggi, Mrs. Teena Mulder, Mulder is the fulfilment of Navajo Prophecy and that's not racist, Napier's Constant, Native Americans are not wizards, Nazis, Nicholas Lea, One Draft Carter says "eh good enough", Pull the plug, Queen of Spoilers, Real Genius, Rebecca Toolan, Richard 'Ringo' Langly, Rob Bowman, Scully would rather call an 85yr old Navajo Code Talker to stay with her dying sister than anyone in her family, Scully's lame-o daddy issues, scurrying aliens, Sheila Larken, Skinner vs Krycek, sleepytime Navajo Albert, Smoking Man lives in Skinner's closet, Sophie's choice for Claire, The Lone Gunmen, The Well-Manicured Man, The Wolverine, There's a new man in Skinner's Closet and he knows DAT tape, This is why they call it the X-Files, Tom Braidwood, Tony Stark, Victor Klemper, Vouchsafe, Walking Dead Podcast, Walter Gotell, Walter Skinner, West-Side-Story-cek, What does the Monday at work look like after your boss steals your child?, When you are a jet you're a jet all the way, White Buffalo, Why would you make alien human hybrids, Why would you need to be able to identify bodies after a doomsday apocylpse?, William B. Davis

Welcome to the third season, where things are just as ridiculous as ever. Dave joins us as we learn why your health insurance doesn’t cover trips to the rez for medical treatment. Scully is being molested left and right and it is not appropriate. We celebrate the rambling return of dream Deep Throat and Melissa (as well as her shitty crystal choker) gets what she deserves.

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Where you won’t be arbitrarily charged for insubordination.

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Listen to Episode 3×01 – 1:28:36

Tags: A hut is not a hospital, Albert Hosteen, Alex Krycek William B. Davis, Alf Humphreys, America, Baron Munchausen, Before 9/11 metal detectors were 98% imaginary, Brad Cupples, Brad is the Giles Corey of watching X-Files, Bravehearts fighting for the rights of all the dreamers, Chris Carter, Chris Carter's Empire Strikes Back, Cigarette Smoking Man, Claire Laffar, Creepy Ghost Alien Rescue Squad, Criss-Cross Applesauce, Crystal Sister, Dakota House, Dana Scully, David Duchovny, Deep Throat, DIE MELISSA DIE!, Don't trust the white dudes, Douchecopter, Dr. Pomerantz, Dream chattin', dvmpe.com, eh I'll try and flag you down from my car while I flee my death, Elaborate Faux Shakespeare Monologues, Eric Hosteen, Floyd 'Red Crow' Westerman, Fox Mulder, Freddy Kruger Mulder, FUCK THAT BITCH AND HER CRYSTAL CHOKER, ghost aliens, Ghost Mulder, Gillian Anderson, Grandpa Joe, gross cigarette dude from Fearful Symmetry, Hey dummies... you control all the secret info and can't work out a light switch?, holotropic breath work, If someone tells you not to shower for your health punch them in their goddamn filthy fucking face, Inappropriate funeral tactics, introtox, introtox.com, Jerry Hardin, Jerry Hardin has no clue what the block of nonsense means, John Neville, Jonny-Come-Lately Feedback, Laying someone in a salad is not medical treatment, leading questions from a fake doctor, Major Briggs, Margaret Scully, Melinda McGraw, Melissa needs to visit a fashion therapist to see what is wrong with her, Melissa Scully, Melvin Frohike, Michael David Simms, Mitch Pileggi, Molestation Files, Monsters, Mormon Conspiracies, Native American Style, Nicholas Lea, Ninja Mimes, One Two Mulder's monotone is ewww Three Four get ready to snore Five Six he's touching his sister's pics Seven Eight tape up an 'X' and wait, P.S. Your choker sucks too, Peter Donat, Professor X, Put your fucking shoes on Scully, R.W. Goodwin, Regression therapy is not a thing, Robin Burdge, Season Three, Senior Agent, Shawshank Abduction, Sheila Larken, Shit's tough in the FP, Singing and incense are not the same thing as an IV, Smokey lives in Skinner's closet, Stop molesting Scully, STOP! Your unprovoked touching and sexual harassment is not wanted or appreciated, Tammy Ginader, The Blessing Way, The Elders, The Mulder family was so poor they had to share their only acting chop each night... this taught them to get by on less for the rest of their lives, The Native American Four Days of Awful Plan is Frohike approved, The Well-Manicured Man, The worst photoshop ever, The Zzzzzzz Files, Tom Braidwood, Twin Peaks, Uncomfortable Admissions with Robin, Walter Skinner, What is she being charged being insubordination of?, what's your problem with buzzards? They're just trying to get by in a tough world, wikifeet.com, William Mulder, X-Files, xfiles, Yo Albert, Your Father should be ashamed you barefooted monster

It’s a shocking season finale cliffhanger as Jodie eXplodes onto the scene to chat about ‘Anasazi’ We’ve never been closer to the truth and it’s bigger than we ever realized as Krycek is back in the mix and Scully is capitalizing on every opportunity to get Mulder unconscious. We also learn that ninjas are doing something inappropriate and one our listeners is either affiliated with the NSA or is a witch.

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Where you and your little notes are always welcome.

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Listen to Episode 2×25 – 1:39:01

Tags: 1013, Acting Chops, Against the Ninja -with Dragon Sound & The Thinker Shaggers, Albert Hosteen, Alex Krycek, Anasazi, Baywatch Nights, Bernie Coulson, Bruce Harwood, Chris Carter, Cigarette Smoking Man, Dakota House, Dana Scully, David Duchovny, Dean Haglund, Duchovney's two speeds of acting, Eric Hosteen, Father-Lover, Fox Mulder Gillian Anderson, God is burning my dick... what does it mean?, Harry Truman School of Acting, He's a big deal --Stop talking shit about him!, He's just a Bill and he's working there on Capitol Hill, Headlock Skinner, Heroes, Hey ninjas calm it the fuck down, I've got a ninja party shagging my butt, I've got a ninja party shaking my butt, I've got a ninja party shaving my butt, John Fitzgerald Byers, Josephine Doane, Ken Camroux, Kenneth Soona, Leave the snakes alone, Max Finnick, Melvin Frohike, Merchandise, Michael David Simms, Mitch Pileggi, Navajo Code Talkers, Nicholas Lea, Nothing vanishes without a trace! Burn it!, One Year Aniversay, Painted rocks, Peter Donat, R.W. Goodwin, Refridgerator car of terror corpses, Renae Morriseau, Richard 'Ringo' Langly, Scooby Doo Antics, Senior Agent #1, Senior Agent #2, Skinner Mulder Smackdown, Sly-cek, Surrounded by bodies, Taking your little notes, The MJ Files, The most ridiculously convulloted water polluting scheme ever, The music... the voice... the legend... the dream... the Chris, The Thinker, Tom Braidwood, Two Grey Hills, Walter Skinner, We're gonna shut down the X-Files... again, When will Tammy's Dreams come true?, William B. Davis, William Mulder Floyd 'Red Crow' Westerman, Woody Wood, X Marks the most boring book ever imagined!, X-Files Day, X-Files Days... turn into X-Files Nights

Nutty hops over to discuss Cannibal Shenanigans and the failure of an objectivist super hero in the episode ‘Our Town’. We talk about bizarrely orientated mirrors, Scully’s continued kidnap counter, and old fashioned froggy philosophy.

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Where it only takes one little froggy to stop the engine of the world.

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Listen to Episode 2×24 – 1:39:01

Tags: A character that leaves something out, A town built on a good foundation of Chicken and Froggy Stories, Anasazi, Atlas Shrugged, Ayn Rand, Baywatch Nights, Bored Mulder, Brad Cupples, Cannibal crazies, Caroline Kava, Carrie Cain-Sparks, Chump Mulder, Claire Laffar, Cooper, Creighton Jone(s), Creutzfeld-Jakob, Dana Scully, David Duchovny, dick spasm, Doctor Doom, Doris Kearns, Dorris what is your deal, Dr. Vance Randolph, Fox Mulder, Foxfire, Frank Spotnitz, Gabrielle Miller, Gary Grubbs, George Kearns, Gillian Anderson, Gilligan's Island Tech, Good People... Good Food, How old are all these people supposed to be, Hrothgar Mathews, If you kill and eat your husband you should be a bit harder than this flaky bitch, introtox, introtox.com, Jale tribe, Jess Harold, John Maclaren, John Milford, Just a small town cult, Leo Johnson Window Tech, Lilly pads, Line Hypnosis, Loki'd, Mad cow disease, Maid, May we do an autopsy as part of our MURDER investigation... please?, Mental Patient, Mulder shades play by their own rules, nimlas.org, Nutty Bites Podcast, Nutty Nuchtchas, Our Town, Papua New Guinea, Paula Gray, prion disease, Put a helmet on that woman already, River Ferreira, Rob Bowman, Robert Moloney, Robin Burdge, Robin Mossley, Scully gets kidnapped, SCULLY WTF ARE YOU DOING WITH THE POTENTIALLY DEADLY CHICKEN?, She played all the moms, Sheriff Tom 'Froggy' Arens, Sick Theories, Tammy Ginader, That dude loves chicken his granddaughter... not so much, That's a goo d 47, The local federal inspector, This isn't faith it's fear, Timothy Webber, Tons of bones to pick, Unnecessary Breaking and Entering, Vat of terror, Voodoo, Walter Chaco, We just don't say 'Hollies' anymore... it's from a different time, When a froggy falls in a froggy falls in, When Robin says 'snooty' does he mean 'upity'? YIKES #racial, Who is John Gault, Why are near immortals still working in a shitty chicken factory, Why is this hadda herda sheriff helping them? Just do a shitty fake drag of the river you dummy, Witch's Peg, Worst Mask, X-Files, xfiles, Young Cannibal

Steph joins us from the shadows to discuss ‘Soft Light’ It’s an emotional roller coaster as Brad loses his one true love to the most nonsensical plot ever derived. Vince Gilligan makes his writing debut… and Chris Carter throws monkey wrenches to water it down.

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Where no one will suck you into a blackhole/darkmatter/whatever.

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Listen to Episode 2×23 – 1:52:01

Tags: 1013, 606, Angels in the End Zone, bawl, Baywatch Nights, bewailing, Big Coat, Blackhole, blubber, Brad Cupples, Brainsuck, Breaking Bad, Broken-Hearted, Chester Bonaparte, Chris Carter, Chris Carter is a humorless plot thwarter, Claire has forgotten the greatest character ever... (as well as 9/11), Claire Laffar, Creaighton Duke(s), Dark Matter, David Duchovny, Detective Barron, Donna Yamamoto, Dr. Chester Ray Banton, Dr. Christopher Davey, Dust in the Wind, Enhance!, F. Emasculata, Football has end zones and goal posts... this seems like overkill. Pick one you greedy steroid engorged fuckos, Forbes Angus, Geanie, Gender Bender, Gillian Anderson, Government Scientist, Hot Winds, introtox, introtox.com, James A. Contner, Kate Twa, Kelly Ryan, Kevin McNulty, Krycek, lamentation, Laser pointers $49.95 in 1995 vs 99¢ now, Marty, Mel Only takes joy from the torment and sorrow of others, Monk, Morris... Who the fuck is Morris?!?, Mother of Introcasts and/or Dragons, mourning, Mr. X, Mr. X can eat a shadow dick. I am done with that fool. Done. Donezo, Murse, Nathaniel DeVeaux, Night Nurse, Nonsexist nonracist shadows, One woman just trying to make it in a harsh world with a big coat and big dreams, Particle accelerator countdown = perfect time for a coffee break, Polarity Magnetics, PotentialCast, prophylactic, RedemptionCast, Richmond VA, Robert Rozen, Robin Burdge, Robin buys the most boring book in the world, Rufus, Schmaking Schmad, Scully might be the Doogie Howser of the FBI, Shadow People, Shadows, Shadows are not a thing... they are just absense of light... you can't... it's not a... if it... ughh, shedding tears, Shortest Feedback Showdown, Single tear, Sisterhood of the Traveling Coat, Skipping Ahead, So are they ever going to finish building this stadium? No? Cool. Nice sunglasses. Asshole., Sobbing, Soft Light, Sometimes things get tender between a teacher and student at Quantico, sorrow, Spontaneous Human Combustion, Squeeze, Steven Williams, Tammy Ginader, tears, That is NOT how shadows work, The first time their giant flashlights could have been used to defeat the monster of the week, The only thing he dusted for prints was a light bulb? Really? Why?, This is the dumbest concept ever, Tony Shalhoub, Tooms, Utility belt, Vince Gilligan, Wall-to-wall Coats, weep, Weeping, What's on with Steph and Des, X-Files, X-Files Month, xfiles, You've come a long way Big Coat!